yang hong was so kind to agree to host the gathering occasion for a big bunch of sec sch friends.
a newly reconstructed landed property with 11 rooms, what a luxury for those who live in smaller residential units.
the catered food was yummy, esp the fried hokkien noodles.
after so many yrs, we finally gathered again. the familiarity of the youthful feeling, the closeness of the past days etc....made us feel great and important.
many faces were recognisable, esp zaidah who hasnt aged a bit. noor hashikin is still as cute and chubby as before. both are now teachers.
olive still looks the same. she was touched when i told her that my best memory of her was as a story-teller representative on stage....siew mui looked the youngest among all, no change in shape and size.
hok ling's son, victor carries a sizeable body and i think he knocked down the x'mas tree. what a sight!
the gathering coincided with yang hong's bdae and hok ling ordered a cake for her. the doting hubby even sang love songs for her, with lyrics 'if there's a next life, i will still choose u..' how romantic. we were touched. i mean, lame besty and me.
joy and claire enjoyed much with serene's 2 kids, ting and ling too! every one commented that ling resembled serene's sch days, but seriously i think, ling is prettier compared to the bespectacled serene then! but, it's her blur look that i was charmed with then....decent, unthreatening, sincere and funny!
on reminscence, my friendship with serene dated back to 13 yrs old....and we hv had many fun innocent days of togetherness. whenever she aggravated me, i would ignore her and then, she would call me 'small gas'...i guess, back then, our command of english was really limited, so broken english was the fun part of our sch days.
we were the last 2 families to leave. the 4 kids were having a whale of a time at the playground beside the house. with shoes removed and running around like a monkey, it was such a bliss to have their friendship established since babyhood!
it's many thks to sylvia and hok ling who made this gathering possible. their safekeeping of updated contact details and effort to coordinate is very much appreciated.
Monday, December 5, 2011
bad behaviour
i was involved in a chinese camp with claire and a group of kids, led by few chinese teachers.
a boy in lower primary behaved so badly that it shocked me out of my life. truly, i hv not seen someone who's so ill in emotional control, such that he could slap another girl's face, in the process of a bickering session, or push a younger boy coz' he needed the space to watch a show.
worse still, he started shouting at me, commanding,"why do u give the answer to the other pple? u r in my group, u knw?"
also, he uttered,"just give me all the answers and we will win..."
he simply didn't knw his limitations in chinese language....giving him an answer with a slightly longer sentence, he began to fumble and stammer, and started shouting like a lunatic.
all that i could say is, a boy with extreme competitive and kiasu behaviour really goes out of control easily. because of his eagerness to win, he loses sight of what team spirit is all about. he starts being disrepectful to teachers as well....i pity the mother who has to handle a kid with violence inclination, and his sibling who gets beaten up by him, out of no good reason.
aye, is it fair to say that a child's behaviour reflects the parents' style of parenting? maybe not. but it does tell that the parents hv lost control over the kids' action!
a boy in lower primary behaved so badly that it shocked me out of my life. truly, i hv not seen someone who's so ill in emotional control, such that he could slap another girl's face, in the process of a bickering session, or push a younger boy coz' he needed the space to watch a show.
worse still, he started shouting at me, commanding,"why do u give the answer to the other pple? u r in my group, u knw?"
also, he uttered,"just give me all the answers and we will win..."
he simply didn't knw his limitations in chinese language....giving him an answer with a slightly longer sentence, he began to fumble and stammer, and started shouting like a lunatic.
all that i could say is, a boy with extreme competitive and kiasu behaviour really goes out of control easily. because of his eagerness to win, he loses sight of what team spirit is all about. he starts being disrepectful to teachers as well....i pity the mother who has to handle a kid with violence inclination, and his sibling who gets beaten up by him, out of no good reason.
aye, is it fair to say that a child's behaviour reflects the parents' style of parenting? maybe not. but it does tell that the parents hv lost control over the kids' action!
car dent repair
well, i'm happy that my dent on the left side of the car is finally repaired. reasonable cost of less than sgd200.
a dent that i wouldn't like to talk much about....an accident of someone knocking onto my car while dashing across the road with a mobile in hand.
5 over mths, i bore with the unsightly dent....having no time to send it to the car workshop.
when sth gets done, it's like a great mission accomplished!
over this dent, hubby commented the other day,"my reputation is tarnished becoz of ur accidents!" a hurtful comment but i chose to stay mum. he's not totally wrong, just that the manner that it was being uttered didn't sound too kind (at least, to me!)
afterall, the impact is on his insurance ncb...of coz he feels the pinch!
to me, so long as no one gets into critical injury, it's 破财消灾啦！小事，别跟他人计较，生活也比较爽快吧！
when i get back next wk, time to send the car for svcg too!
a dent that i wouldn't like to talk much about....an accident of someone knocking onto my car while dashing across the road with a mobile in hand.
5 over mths, i bore with the unsightly dent....having no time to send it to the car workshop.
when sth gets done, it's like a great mission accomplished!
over this dent, hubby commented the other day,"my reputation is tarnished becoz of ur accidents!" a hurtful comment but i chose to stay mum. he's not totally wrong, just that the manner that it was being uttered didn't sound too kind (at least, to me!)
afterall, the impact is on his insurance ncb...of coz he feels the pinch!
to me, so long as no one gets into critical injury, it's 破财消灾啦！小事，别跟他人计较，生活也比较爽快吧！
when i get back next wk, time to send the car for svcg too!
we are flying off...
we are flying off tnte to twn.
no fixed agenda, no booking of 1st nite accomodation...it's a high-risk holiday. let's pray that we will not end up with any nites of non-lodging, haha.
taipei is rainy season...looks like the whole of this week will be wet in most parts of taiwan.
wulai...we come. shifen, it's my dream to go there to release the sky lanterns. yilan, the onion pancakes i continue to salivate at the thot of it....many many things we hope to accomplish.
but, we shall rough it out, if need be. coz' the breadwinner prefers to hv no fixed agenda, so as to provide greater flexibility for the family.
praying for safety and a good adventure. surely, it will be!
no fixed agenda, no booking of 1st nite accomodation...it's a high-risk holiday. let's pray that we will not end up with any nites of non-lodging, haha.
taipei is rainy season...looks like the whole of this week will be wet in most parts of taiwan.
wulai...we come. shifen, it's my dream to go there to release the sky lanterns. yilan, the onion pancakes i continue to salivate at the thot of it....many many things we hope to accomplish.
but, we shall rough it out, if need be. coz' the breadwinner prefers to hv no fixed agenda, so as to provide greater flexibility for the family.
praying for safety and a good adventure. surely, it will be!
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
year-end cleaning
i'm at a loss of how to start unpacking the unwanted old stuff to make way for new storage space.
my place has been short of storage all these years. it's my wish to have hidden storage shelves and cabinets to keep the bulky items away from sight.
i've been telling claire,"u need to give away more clothes, books and toys to make the place look neat!" she's agreeable. afterall, she's looking fwd to go on a purchase spree in taiwan come dec.
i need to call in a contractor to do sth....including the spoilt parquet flooring and wall furnishing. it will be a lot to handle....i can already imagine the dust in the air causing my organs to itch.....
ah sue was at my place last sat and commented that my dressing table is over-loaded with things. u see, the problem is, when one gets used to certain things, it actually becomes acceptable.
aye, if only we have lived like a minimalist, our place would be less cluttered. is that the right word to use?
my place has been short of storage all these years. it's my wish to have hidden storage shelves and cabinets to keep the bulky items away from sight.
i've been telling claire,"u need to give away more clothes, books and toys to make the place look neat!" she's agreeable. afterall, she's looking fwd to go on a purchase spree in taiwan come dec.
i need to call in a contractor to do sth....including the spoilt parquet flooring and wall furnishing. it will be a lot to handle....i can already imagine the dust in the air causing my organs to itch.....
ah sue was at my place last sat and commented that my dressing table is over-loaded with things. u see, the problem is, when one gets used to certain things, it actually becomes acceptable.
aye, if only we have lived like a minimalist, our place would be less cluttered. is that the right word to use?
joy is busking today!
as part of her sch cca, joy and few other friends would be busking at tampines this afternoon! isn't it cool?
she has been practising really hard in school these few weeks. her basic techniques have really improved. well, hard work does pay off.
i was just remarking to joy last night,"within these 3 yrs, u have made a drastic change. from a raw shy self, u now enjoy public performance so much and is constantly upgrading yourself in dance techniques and moves!"
claire added,"ya lor, joy, only 1095 days!"
haha, did her comment add any value to mine? well, that's claire in her detached self.
i'm not sure if i will be able to drop by the east mall to watch her today. timing seems to clash with sending claire off to school for her cca chinese dance! being a mom to 2 girls is really no easy feat, sometimes u dunno how to split your time between the 2.
on the whole, however, claire got more of my time in terms of togetherness while joy got more of my spiritual support, haha. how's that?
this sat, joy will hv another public performance. she and another dance friend had taken the trouble to buy and lug 3 chairs each from ikea last wkend, only to call for a cab to get home after that. these 6 chairs are for their perfce this sat. she's all bz this week....and it's the last week of school!
she has been practising really hard in school these few weeks. her basic techniques have really improved. well, hard work does pay off.
i was just remarking to joy last night,"within these 3 yrs, u have made a drastic change. from a raw shy self, u now enjoy public performance so much and is constantly upgrading yourself in dance techniques and moves!"
claire added,"ya lor, joy, only 1095 days!"
haha, did her comment add any value to mine? well, that's claire in her detached self.
i'm not sure if i will be able to drop by the east mall to watch her today. timing seems to clash with sending claire off to school for her cca chinese dance! being a mom to 2 girls is really no easy feat, sometimes u dunno how to split your time between the 2.
on the whole, however, claire got more of my time in terms of togetherness while joy got more of my spiritual support, haha. how's that?
this sat, joy will hv another public performance. she and another dance friend had taken the trouble to buy and lug 3 chairs each from ikea last wkend, only to call for a cab to get home after that. these 6 chairs are for their perfce this sat. she's all bz this week....and it's the last week of school!
journal saga
claire had a sleepover with 2 frds at my place on 18th nov, the last day of sch.
i requested that she writes a journal about her sleepover experience, to store as everlasting memory.
her first piece was delivered last nite. i rejected it. reason being, it was totally disorganised and was mainly written in conversation style, which i found it redundant.
today, i requested for her 2nd submission. she started off fine but again, reverted to her old style of using unnecessary conversations.
with my headache, i was really losing my patience. my voice a lil raised when i told her the right thing to do, tantamount to telling her that she should re-do the piece again.
'devastated', she broke down and cried, unable to face with my rejection of her work. i lost my cool and started hitting her back with a small pillow. i hate it whenever the kids use crying as the weapon.
my anger came from her not paying attention to what i had said and consequently, repeating same mistakes. her frustration stemmed from not understanding what had gone wrong with her journal writing.
so, it was no communication between us for half and hour. when the heat simmered, she spoke,"i hv no idea how u want me to write it!"
anyway, i told her to sit beside me and bit by bit, we recounted the events, with special emphasis on doing away with redundancies of sentences and conversation speeches.
twds the end, she thanked me for taking the time to do it with her. i responded,"claire, i won't mind we sit through stuff like that coz u can better understand the expectation of a good journal! what i was angry about was your inattentive attitude when pple give u advice on the writing...."
seriously, no one is born a good writer. but, i told her that it's impt to develop her own writing style. shunning writing is definitely not the way to do it. submitting a piece of disorganised work only reflects her inattentive attitude.
hopefully, she will understand my intention and take writing more seriously.
i requested that she writes a journal about her sleepover experience, to store as everlasting memory.
her first piece was delivered last nite. i rejected it. reason being, it was totally disorganised and was mainly written in conversation style, which i found it redundant.
today, i requested for her 2nd submission. she started off fine but again, reverted to her old style of using unnecessary conversations.
with my headache, i was really losing my patience. my voice a lil raised when i told her the right thing to do, tantamount to telling her that she should re-do the piece again.
'devastated', she broke down and cried, unable to face with my rejection of her work. i lost my cool and started hitting her back with a small pillow. i hate it whenever the kids use crying as the weapon.
my anger came from her not paying attention to what i had said and consequently, repeating same mistakes. her frustration stemmed from not understanding what had gone wrong with her journal writing.
so, it was no communication between us for half and hour. when the heat simmered, she spoke,"i hv no idea how u want me to write it!"
anyway, i told her to sit beside me and bit by bit, we recounted the events, with special emphasis on doing away with redundancies of sentences and conversation speeches.
twds the end, she thanked me for taking the time to do it with her. i responded,"claire, i won't mind we sit through stuff like that coz u can better understand the expectation of a good journal! what i was angry about was your inattentive attitude when pple give u advice on the writing...."
seriously, no one is born a good writer. but, i told her that it's impt to develop her own writing style. shunning writing is definitely not the way to do it. submitting a piece of disorganised work only reflects her inattentive attitude.
hopefully, she will understand my intention and take writing more seriously.
late for class!
this morn, i woke up feeling really lethargic. wow, 10 plus am.
checking my hp msgs, i was surprised to read,"v, are u coming at 10am?"
omg, i totally let the class timing slip my mind and did not prepare for the lesson.
or am i getting old and absent-minded? well, i decided none of these was true. i was just plain tired from the monthly cycle and have been suffering from bad headache these few days.
i quickly got ready and arranged for the class to be 11.30 am.
thk gdness, it is holiday time. everyone is relaxed and has more time to spare for such 'abnormality'!
so, i survived the lesson and to make up for my 'forgetfulness', i gave the stdt an extra half an hour of teaching.
i love her, anyway.
checking my hp msgs, i was surprised to read,"v, are u coming at 10am?"
omg, i totally let the class timing slip my mind and did not prepare for the lesson.
or am i getting old and absent-minded? well, i decided none of these was true. i was just plain tired from the monthly cycle and have been suffering from bad headache these few days.
i quickly got ready and arranged for the class to be 11.30 am.
thk gdness, it is holiday time. everyone is relaxed and has more time to spare for such 'abnormality'!
so, i survived the lesson and to make up for my 'forgetfulness', i gave the stdt an extra half an hour of teaching.
i love her, anyway.
Monday, November 21, 2011
an observation
i was out with dad and mom plus a bunch of boisterous kids (claire included).
at the food court, dad was asking one granddaughter for her doufu dish. she was really reluctant to share and responded,"huh!" i was indeed shocked with her reaction.
finally, it was just one piece spared to gonggong after much cajoling.
actually, eating habit is very personal. some kids are just not keen to share their food with the others.
however, with my kids, they hv been trained from young to share their food. it might be a small matter but the meaning of it is far-fetched. i dread having kids who refuse to share, only to pass on unfinished food to their parents for consumption. this is a taboo in my family....coz' i always tell them, "even with the last piece on my plate, i am able to offer u!"
i realise many values need to be taught and reinforced. eating leftovers, no thanks! food, when served hot, has to be shared right from the start. i knw a lot of parents wouldn't mind picking up the scraps of the kids' plates, but not for me! it's a way to tell kids that 'you dun save the remains for the pple u love, but u give the best portion of sharing when the food is still piping hot!"
playing games is another interesting way of assessing a kid. the kiasu syndrome will be exhibited in an unconscious way.....some kids are so competitive that it really takes away the joy of playing with them!
like what popo always said,"one type of grain feeds the whole population lah!" so, accepting pple to be different in their own ways is also a good value. Ah Q spirit!
at the food court, dad was asking one granddaughter for her doufu dish. she was really reluctant to share and responded,"huh!" i was indeed shocked with her reaction.
finally, it was just one piece spared to gonggong after much cajoling.
actually, eating habit is very personal. some kids are just not keen to share their food with the others.
however, with my kids, they hv been trained from young to share their food. it might be a small matter but the meaning of it is far-fetched. i dread having kids who refuse to share, only to pass on unfinished food to their parents for consumption. this is a taboo in my family....coz' i always tell them, "even with the last piece on my plate, i am able to offer u!"
i realise many values need to be taught and reinforced. eating leftovers, no thanks! food, when served hot, has to be shared right from the start. i knw a lot of parents wouldn't mind picking up the scraps of the kids' plates, but not for me! it's a way to tell kids that 'you dun save the remains for the pple u love, but u give the best portion of sharing when the food is still piping hot!"
playing games is another interesting way of assessing a kid. the kiasu syndrome will be exhibited in an unconscious way.....some kids are so competitive that it really takes away the joy of playing with them!
like what popo always said,"one type of grain feeds the whole population lah!" so, accepting pple to be different in their own ways is also a good value. Ah Q spirit!
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
jumbo sale
claire, with her classmates, conducted a jumbo sale in school today. their team reaped over sgd100 and it was a great success, having attracted great level of response of players. it must have been the nicely wrapped up colourful toys contributed by the girls in the group.
upon hopping in the car, she gaily reported to me that she accidentally found a sgd6 coupon on the floor. so, she and her besty, j picked it up and split between them, for more games galore!
she has won some tokens from other games and also purchased 1 or 2 toys at a mere
sgd1.
the sale experience was obviously an interesting learning experience for her. i hope she will continue to like such organised activity and will appreciate in a group!
after exams, all kids have been enjoying themselves so much without homework and much teaching in school. well, hopefully claire will prep up her energy in a week or so, and start her running engine for p6 syllabus soon.
i'm still not inclined to have her attend tuition classes. self-driven effort is always the best effort, i maintain my stand!
upon hopping in the car, she gaily reported to me that she accidentally found a sgd6 coupon on the floor. so, she and her besty, j picked it up and split between them, for more games galore!
she has won some tokens from other games and also purchased 1 or 2 toys at a mere
sgd1.
the sale experience was obviously an interesting learning experience for her. i hope she will continue to like such organised activity and will appreciate in a group!
after exams, all kids have been enjoying themselves so much without homework and much teaching in school. well, hopefully claire will prep up her energy in a week or so, and start her running engine for p6 syllabus soon.
i'm still not inclined to have her attend tuition classes. self-driven effort is always the best effort, i maintain my stand!
a fright!
i was half-way tutoring M this morning, when i felt something 'brushing' agst my feet.
in my heart, i was wondering what was wrong with M, with her feet constantly knocking into mine. thank goodness, it was a female student. it would have been embarassing for both parties, if it were a male student!
then, i felt sth cold....like a lick rather than a knock. yes, it felt more like a tongue...gross!
out of curiosity, i took a peep under the table. i nearly fainted....
guess what? it was M's favourite puppy, sandy licking my feet!
every one knows how frightful i am of dogs, or for that matter, all animals. my immediate responses were to yelp and lift my legs to rest on the arm of the chair, telling M to quickly 'invite' the dog back to the kennel!
when M carried the poor dog from the floor, both of us couldn't help but let out a loud laughter. i must hv looked a most embarassing tutor. i even hv to apologise to her for being so 'nasty' and 'unfriendly' to her pet, coz' i'm just afraid of dogs!
of coz, she didn't mind. having stuck through all thicks and thins with me for 5 years! she must have just found me comical and inexplicable to dislike dogs!
in fact, one little 7-year old girl asked me,"ms verlyn, why are u afraid of dogs?"
"well, that's a tough question. i just dun like anything furry or walk on 4 legs!" haha, that explained why indians with furry chest freaked me out! of coz, babies crawling on 4 limbs are not included in the 4-legged creature category!
haha, is that even a fine excuse? in fact, my 3 other sisters share the same symptoms as me, 对狗有恐慌症! thks to my mom who never taught us to like animals from young, hehe! or maybe, i was hotly 'pursued' by a mad dog before when i was young...that dated many many years ago...
once upon a time,.....
in my heart, i was wondering what was wrong with M, with her feet constantly knocking into mine. thank goodness, it was a female student. it would have been embarassing for both parties, if it were a male student!
then, i felt sth cold....like a lick rather than a knock. yes, it felt more like a tongue...gross!
out of curiosity, i took a peep under the table. i nearly fainted....
guess what? it was M's favourite puppy, sandy licking my feet!
every one knows how frightful i am of dogs, or for that matter, all animals. my immediate responses were to yelp and lift my legs to rest on the arm of the chair, telling M to quickly 'invite' the dog back to the kennel!
when M carried the poor dog from the floor, both of us couldn't help but let out a loud laughter. i must hv looked a most embarassing tutor. i even hv to apologise to her for being so 'nasty' and 'unfriendly' to her pet, coz' i'm just afraid of dogs!
of coz, she didn't mind. having stuck through all thicks and thins with me for 5 years! she must have just found me comical and inexplicable to dislike dogs!
in fact, one little 7-year old girl asked me,"ms verlyn, why are u afraid of dogs?"
"well, that's a tough question. i just dun like anything furry or walk on 4 legs!" haha, that explained why indians with furry chest freaked me out! of coz, babies crawling on 4 limbs are not included in the 4-legged creature category!
haha, is that even a fine excuse? in fact, my 3 other sisters share the same symptoms as me, 对狗有恐慌症! thks to my mom who never taught us to like animals from young, hehe! or maybe, i was hotly 'pursued' by a mad dog before when i was young...that dated many many years ago...
once upon a time,.....
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
joy's new product launch
hey, visit joy's blogshop at 'www.loadedwardrobe.blogshop.com'!
she's just launched a new line of 'topshop inspired' products at more affordable prices!
the products are selling well and she's happy collating her orders!
to her, it's not so much pricing in a thick margin but rather, the satisfaction of seeing pple attracted to her product range. of coz, she enjoys stocking her own wardrobe too!
some 2 wks ago, she was contemplating to spend some money to 'model' her own clothes by taking pics in a studio.
but ysterday, she confessed,"i think there's no need already lah! thks to jacky who asked me to publicise to the wide hip hop group of members, i really have response coming in!"
well, things are progressing well for her. her soft rebonding hair is done, her peformance shows are lining up, she's enjoying her dance and friends.....except a little reminder that she should start 'pulling up her socks' or maybe 'her pantyhose' to work on her subjects.....her results are a far cry from the expected uni-level admission criteria....hope she will settle down with the 'distractions' of life and hv a recreation-work life balance, yo!
she's just launched a new line of 'topshop inspired' products at more affordable prices!
the products are selling well and she's happy collating her orders!
to her, it's not so much pricing in a thick margin but rather, the satisfaction of seeing pple attracted to her product range. of coz, she enjoys stocking her own wardrobe too!
some 2 wks ago, she was contemplating to spend some money to 'model' her own clothes by taking pics in a studio.
but ysterday, she confessed,"i think there's no need already lah! thks to jacky who asked me to publicise to the wide hip hop group of members, i really have response coming in!"
well, things are progressing well for her. her soft rebonding hair is done, her peformance shows are lining up, she's enjoying her dance and friends.....except a little reminder that she should start 'pulling up her socks' or maybe 'her pantyhose' to work on her subjects.....her results are a far cry from the expected uni-level admission criteria....hope she will settle down with the 'distractions' of life and hv a recreation-work life balance, yo!
tuitions for claire?
well, claire asked (yes, on her own accord) if she should go for tuition/ psle prep classes for english and science. yup, only 2 subjects she's enquiring about.
well, i hv no objection. question is where?
i reckon that next yr will be a critical yr for her. her psle, syf chinese dance training plus her own pte hip hop concert in aug. and now, the superstar training. throw in 2 tuition classes, she will be swarmed!
privately, i'm hoping that she can manage a good psle results without tuition at all! frankly, having a good teacher in the school and diligently doing ur own practice at home, hold the key!
claire has always been weaker in spelling words. i used to tease her saying she's 'mildly dyslexic'.....no offense lah! then, i learn from hubby that he was like that too, not being able to make out words structure and spelling words properly! so, the truth is out lah! that's why, i'm more 'forgiving' towards claire these days, knowing that the 'shortfall' traits might hv been inherited. haha, talk about genetics!
i hv been urging claire to start her daily spelling list....afterall, your own effort to learn spelling beats going for tuition classes, right? maybe i'm a self-driven learner and is not for the idea of spending money for kids to bump around for extra classes!
as for sci, i believe claire has the thinking skills but is limited by the phrasing of the answers. but, which kid is not? we just need to give them time and encourage them to use the right answering techniques!
i told her the other day,"claire, u might hv to give nxt yr hip hop concert in aug a miss!"
"but why, mom? i can do 2 or 3 items only!" she retorted.
"my problem is with the time-consuming rehearsals in jurong, so far and waste so much time!" i explained.
in the end, we agreed that she must show me the ability to manage her time well before she can go for the YNDA concert! haha, the kids told me to guess the meaning of YNDA and i thot it was some '...dance association' thingie, but it turned out to be 'You Never Dance Alone'!
well, i hv no objection. question is where?
i reckon that next yr will be a critical yr for her. her psle, syf chinese dance training plus her own pte hip hop concert in aug. and now, the superstar training. throw in 2 tuition classes, she will be swarmed!
privately, i'm hoping that she can manage a good psle results without tuition at all! frankly, having a good teacher in the school and diligently doing ur own practice at home, hold the key!
claire has always been weaker in spelling words. i used to tease her saying she's 'mildly dyslexic'.....no offense lah! then, i learn from hubby that he was like that too, not being able to make out words structure and spelling words properly! so, the truth is out lah! that's why, i'm more 'forgiving' towards claire these days, knowing that the 'shortfall' traits might hv been inherited. haha, talk about genetics!
i hv been urging claire to start her daily spelling list....afterall, your own effort to learn spelling beats going for tuition classes, right? maybe i'm a self-driven learner and is not for the idea of spending money for kids to bump around for extra classes!
as for sci, i believe claire has the thinking skills but is limited by the phrasing of the answers. but, which kid is not? we just need to give them time and encourage them to use the right answering techniques!
i told her the other day,"claire, u might hv to give nxt yr hip hop concert in aug a miss!"
"but why, mom? i can do 2 or 3 items only!" she retorted.
"my problem is with the time-consuming rehearsals in jurong, so far and waste so much time!" i explained.
in the end, we agreed that she must show me the ability to manage her time well before she can go for the YNDA concert! haha, the kids told me to guess the meaning of YNDA and i thot it was some '...dance association' thingie, but it turned out to be 'You Never Dance Alone'!
claire's been selected!
yesterday, i picked up claire after her dance practice. this is not the same chinese dance group, it's another dance practice that emerged from the recent sports carnival house dance!
the intention is to downsize 40 stdts to half the number, to perform on stage on SHINE AWARD day!
amongst the 40 stdts, the teacher has selected 8 stdts or so to come under the 'SUPERSTAR' training! yup, like what hubby said, the 'SUPERSTAR' brand name is a lame name that got kids 'scrambling' to be part of the team.
the sch used to hv this 'superstar' thingie that requires kids to be auditioned, trained and selected for competitions and performance representing the school. but claire was not at all keen on such 'exposure' from young, though she enjoys her chinese dance training and public shows.
so, claire was 'honoured' to be the only one amongst p5 kids to be selected for training. in fact, she said,"mommy, what's yours is yours!" in the same tone as ther daddy, she felt that 'nothing can escape your hands if it's fated to be yours' and 'there's no need to try too hard if it's not destined to be yours!'
in other words, she's a firm believer of 随缘！
well, to me, it's another day of staying back in school! she casually commented,'i must learn to work hard so that my results will not suffer!"
i corrected,"claire, it's working smart, not just hard!"
all these activities are taking too much time but if it helps to groom a kid and develop confidence, as a result, i reckon it's still worth it!
i always stress that, i would rather have a kid who's an all-rounder, than a plain nerdy kid who comes in 1st each yr! life is made up of a bed of multi experiences and youth is the best time that you can give to acquire life skills!
the intention is to downsize 40 stdts to half the number, to perform on stage on SHINE AWARD day!
amongst the 40 stdts, the teacher has selected 8 stdts or so to come under the 'SUPERSTAR' training! yup, like what hubby said, the 'SUPERSTAR' brand name is a lame name that got kids 'scrambling' to be part of the team.
the sch used to hv this 'superstar' thingie that requires kids to be auditioned, trained and selected for competitions and performance representing the school. but claire was not at all keen on such 'exposure' from young, though she enjoys her chinese dance training and public shows.
so, claire was 'honoured' to be the only one amongst p5 kids to be selected for training. in fact, she said,"mommy, what's yours is yours!" in the same tone as ther daddy, she felt that 'nothing can escape your hands if it's fated to be yours' and 'there's no need to try too hard if it's not destined to be yours!'
in other words, she's a firm believer of 随缘！
well, to me, it's another day of staying back in school! she casually commented,'i must learn to work hard so that my results will not suffer!"
i corrected,"claire, it's working smart, not just hard!"
all these activities are taking too much time but if it helps to groom a kid and develop confidence, as a result, i reckon it's still worth it!
i always stress that, i would rather have a kid who's an all-rounder, than a plain nerdy kid who comes in 1st each yr! life is made up of a bed of multi experiences and youth is the best time that you can give to acquire life skills!
Friday, November 4, 2011
dream unburied - for jean
i hv been following this writer's blog journal every now and then. i hope jean will get to read this and continue to be inspired in her journey of faith....towards a
3rd career...
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Have you ever had a dream goal you wanted but thought the chance to reach it has gone?
Perhaps you are thinking, that by now, you would be too old, too slow and too busy to pursue the dream. You may have regrets that you had not spend your youthful days in its pursuit, or guilt that you have let it get away. You may question if you have the financial means, the social support and the inner-strength to do it now. I have one long-buried dream, which I am resurrecting.
In September 1992, I was admitted into the Honours class in Psychology. It was a gorgeous year of learning for me. I spent time reading research articles, debating research methodologies, questioning research results and critiquing one another’s ideas. I was part of three research teams- Family Relations, Adoption and Couple Abuse. It was also a year where the Honours class asked ourselves, “which graduate school are we going to?” There was no doubt that we were being prepared for further research work, and to become future psychology professors, or clinical psychologists.
By February 1993, I was offered graduate places in 5 universities, among which was Teachers’ College, Columbia University. It was an exciting time to choose where I would go next. I was young, bright and lavishing in the great possibilities of youthful scholastic adventures.
I rejected Columbia University because I was afraid to move to New York. In my youthfulness, I let irrational fear get in my way.
I accepted a scholarship and a fellowship from my alma mater to do my Masters. I spent the months of September 1993 to July 1994 in scholarly heaven. I was “paid” to study – read, question, research, discuss and write. I was also teaching undergraduates “Introduction to Psychology”.
One day in early 1994, I got a call to “come home” from my father. I told my research supervisor that I had an opportunity and responsibility to return to Singapore, to set up early childhood education centres. I would continue with my research while I worked and got married. Being the super-achiever that I was, it was not beyond my capabilities to design curriculum, train teachers, get married, and have two sons by 1997. I even had the time to conduct cross-cultural research on mother’s beliefs about education in both Vancouver and Singapore. And write a paper on “Teaching Thinking to Pre-schoolers” for the 7th International Thinking Conference.
Till the retrenchment happened, my third child was born, and my marriage collapsed, all within the last months of 1999.
One of the casualty of my divorce was my studies. I gave it up, in order to be single mother to three young ones, and to develop a new career in Raffles Institution. At that time, with a pinch of salt, I said to myself, “I am putting aside the MA to focus on being a MAMA.”
Nevertheless, the researcher in me remained curious. Even as I counseled and coached adolescents, I observed the interventions, conversations and progress – resulting in a presentation at the 2002 International Congress of Applied Psychology. When I worked with business leaders, I tested assumptions on great leadership. I kept my observations in my journals and I discussed ways to improvement interventions.
Furthermore, writing 22 books helped satisfy the writer in me, while the interviews for “Break to Dawn” was based on qualitative research methods.
You can take the researcher out of the school, but you cannot take the researcher out of me.
And now, almost 20 years after I first started my post-graduate education, after raising 3 children, after 22 books, and countless lessons taught to leaders, I am standing on the edge of a possible return to school.
My children find it hilarious that “mom wants to go to school again” when they cannot wait to end school. My husband thinks I would be a brilliant professor.
It is never too late to unbury a dream. If you believe it is aligned to your life purpose and will make a difference, go take it out. A dear friend asked me, “what would you regret if you do not do it?”
I know it is not too late, but timely. I may not be 23, but I have a wealth of wisdom gained over the last 18 years. I have learnt about life the hard way, I have picked myself up from huge falls, I have become more sensitive and empathetic to the setbacks of leaders. I am now more confident of myself, and more passionate about what I stand for.
I am ready to be a formal scholar again (as opposed to a closet one). For the last three years, I have pondered about this dream goal, questioning if my team is ready to step up and if I am ready for the challenge. Finally, I am going beyond “thinking” – I am taking action. I am starting the process of applying to graduate schools again. This time, not as a 22-year-old but a 41-year-old.
When I was 23 and teaching Introduction to Psychology, I had a student who was 62. She taught me that it was never too late to go back to school, that being a matured student meant she came with wisdom not found in the textbooks, and I delighted in her questions and insights.
She unburied her dream at 62, what about you?
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isnt the writer one who provides such good motivation about life? failures did not strike her off the ground; instead, she rebounded and metaphored herself to a stronger being.....and continues to search for new meanings in life! that's the spirit.
3rd career...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Have you ever had a dream goal you wanted but thought the chance to reach it has gone?
Perhaps you are thinking, that by now, you would be too old, too slow and too busy to pursue the dream. You may have regrets that you had not spend your youthful days in its pursuit, or guilt that you have let it get away. You may question if you have the financial means, the social support and the inner-strength to do it now. I have one long-buried dream, which I am resurrecting.
In September 1992, I was admitted into the Honours class in Psychology. It was a gorgeous year of learning for me. I spent time reading research articles, debating research methodologies, questioning research results and critiquing one another’s ideas. I was part of three research teams- Family Relations, Adoption and Couple Abuse. It was also a year where the Honours class asked ourselves, “which graduate school are we going to?” There was no doubt that we were being prepared for further research work, and to become future psychology professors, or clinical psychologists.
By February 1993, I was offered graduate places in 5 universities, among which was Teachers’ College, Columbia University. It was an exciting time to choose where I would go next. I was young, bright and lavishing in the great possibilities of youthful scholastic adventures.
I rejected Columbia University because I was afraid to move to New York. In my youthfulness, I let irrational fear get in my way.
I accepted a scholarship and a fellowship from my alma mater to do my Masters. I spent the months of September 1993 to July 1994 in scholarly heaven. I was “paid” to study – read, question, research, discuss and write. I was also teaching undergraduates “Introduction to Psychology”.
One day in early 1994, I got a call to “come home” from my father. I told my research supervisor that I had an opportunity and responsibility to return to Singapore, to set up early childhood education centres. I would continue with my research while I worked and got married. Being the super-achiever that I was, it was not beyond my capabilities to design curriculum, train teachers, get married, and have two sons by 1997. I even had the time to conduct cross-cultural research on mother’s beliefs about education in both Vancouver and Singapore. And write a paper on “Teaching Thinking to Pre-schoolers” for the 7th International Thinking Conference.
Till the retrenchment happened, my third child was born, and my marriage collapsed, all within the last months of 1999.
One of the casualty of my divorce was my studies. I gave it up, in order to be single mother to three young ones, and to develop a new career in Raffles Institution. At that time, with a pinch of salt, I said to myself, “I am putting aside the MA to focus on being a MAMA.”
Nevertheless, the researcher in me remained curious. Even as I counseled and coached adolescents, I observed the interventions, conversations and progress – resulting in a presentation at the 2002 International Congress of Applied Psychology. When I worked with business leaders, I tested assumptions on great leadership. I kept my observations in my journals and I discussed ways to improvement interventions.
Furthermore, writing 22 books helped satisfy the writer in me, while the interviews for “Break to Dawn” was based on qualitative research methods.
You can take the researcher out of the school, but you cannot take the researcher out of me.
And now, almost 20 years after I first started my post-graduate education, after raising 3 children, after 22 books, and countless lessons taught to leaders, I am standing on the edge of a possible return to school.
My children find it hilarious that “mom wants to go to school again” when they cannot wait to end school. My husband thinks I would be a brilliant professor.
It is never too late to unbury a dream. If you believe it is aligned to your life purpose and will make a difference, go take it out. A dear friend asked me, “what would you regret if you do not do it?”
I know it is not too late, but timely. I may not be 23, but I have a wealth of wisdom gained over the last 18 years. I have learnt about life the hard way, I have picked myself up from huge falls, I have become more sensitive and empathetic to the setbacks of leaders. I am now more confident of myself, and more passionate about what I stand for.
I am ready to be a formal scholar again (as opposed to a closet one). For the last three years, I have pondered about this dream goal, questioning if my team is ready to step up and if I am ready for the challenge. Finally, I am going beyond “thinking” – I am taking action. I am starting the process of applying to graduate schools again. This time, not as a 22-year-old but a 41-year-old.
When I was 23 and teaching Introduction to Psychology, I had a student who was 62. She taught me that it was never too late to go back to school, that being a matured student meant she came with wisdom not found in the textbooks, and I delighted in her questions and insights.
She unburied her dream at 62, what about you?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
isnt the writer one who provides such good motivation about life? failures did not strike her off the ground; instead, she rebounded and metaphored herself to a stronger being.....and continues to search for new meanings in life! that's the spirit.
being recognised!
just some weeks ago, claire was done with her green house dance item on sports carnival day!
now, the teacher is keen to select only 5 from each house group to put up a performance on SHINE award day...during the rehearsals, she's been constantly praised for her swift movement, particularly in 'shuffling'.....haha, for those who hear this term for the first time, don't fret! i'm in the same shoes too!
apparently, she was the only one who knew how to do it, having learnt it from her pte hip hop class!
ystday, the teacher learnt from another stdt that claire takes up hip hop class. he enquired the venue of her learning and granted further acknowledgement about her steps! claire was obviously thrilled, having received so much attention from the teacher-in-charge!
2 girls even came to befriend her, one saying that she looks cute and another one complimented that she's got sweet voice. haha, my dear princess must have her head swelling so big and continues to stay afloat in the air.....
being recognised is a good form of motivation, esp with kids. maybe, adults too!
i continue to encourage claire to put forth her best, at the same time, reminding her that the final outcome of selection isn't really that impt! just enjoy the process and 不要把得失看得太重！
this whole dance experience is lifting her spirit and i hope she will find more joy in this activity and continue to EXCEL.....and willing to train her cousins on some dance steps, or perform in front of the aunties!
now, the teacher is keen to select only 5 from each house group to put up a performance on SHINE award day...during the rehearsals, she's been constantly praised for her swift movement, particularly in 'shuffling'.....haha, for those who hear this term for the first time, don't fret! i'm in the same shoes too!
apparently, she was the only one who knew how to do it, having learnt it from her pte hip hop class!
ystday, the teacher learnt from another stdt that claire takes up hip hop class. he enquired the venue of her learning and granted further acknowledgement about her steps! claire was obviously thrilled, having received so much attention from the teacher-in-charge!
2 girls even came to befriend her, one saying that she looks cute and another one complimented that she's got sweet voice. haha, my dear princess must have her head swelling so big and continues to stay afloat in the air.....
being recognised is a good form of motivation, esp with kids. maybe, adults too!
i continue to encourage claire to put forth her best, at the same time, reminding her that the final outcome of selection isn't really that impt! just enjoy the process and 不要把得失看得太重！
this whole dance experience is lifting her spirit and i hope she will find more joy in this activity and continue to EXCEL.....and willing to train her cousins on some dance steps, or perform in front of the aunties!
Teen, 14, had 4 abortions
read this article and you will realise how important it is to know the activities that your young daughters are engaged in out there....
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A giggly schoolgirl of only 14, who should be hanging out with peers doing carefree stuff like shopping, sleepovers and makeovers—should NOT have to bear the ordeal of giving birth to a stillborn. But this was exactly what happened to a 14-year-old girl in Malaysia. Believe it or not, it was not her first experience, at this tender age.
4 abortions at 14...
The teenage girl, who still lives with her parents in a shophouse at Pulau Meranti, admitted to having not one, but four abortions. Which makes you wonder, where she went to get those complicated procedures done. How did she get the money? What were her “extra-curricular activities” like?
Her parents found her looking pale and weak one evening. Then they were astonished and alarmed to find their child bleeding profusely. They actually informed a close relative who then lodged a police report.
Upon arrival and inspection, the police found a stillborn baby in a yellow plastic bag, stashed away in the girl’s bedroom. After some questioning, the girl admitted to giving birth to the baby and then to have had four previous pregnancies prior to this one.
How could the parents not have noticed their little girl getting pregnant, not once, but four times? When did she start having sex to have had four abortions already?
Supt. Imran Abdul Rahman, Sepang OCPD, confirmed that police are investigating this case.
Abortion laws....
Like every other country, Singapore has laid down some ground rules too, when it comes to abortion. Here, it is legal to have an abortion on socio-medical grounds. The law states that there is no defined age limit and no legal requirement for parental consent for minors to get the abortion procedure done. However, abortion is prohibited after 24 weeks (6 months) of pregnancy, unless the mother’s life is in danger.
The Singapore Abortion Act also states that girls under 16 years of age have to go through a mandatory counselling session at the Health Promotion Board Counselling Centre. After the session, they will be issued a Certificate of Attendance (COA) – without the cert, abortion will not be legally permissible. A 48-hour waiting period after counselling is mandatory before the procedure can be carried out. Just so that reflection can be done—the worst thing is to regret after having a life taken out of you. There is no turning the clock back.
How well do you know your child?
We parents think that we know all there is to know about our children. What could our kids be hiding from us? Apparently, judging from the case above, the teen concealed a baby bump – and quite successfully for four times.
Talk to your kids about sex; educate them. It is better for them to know than to live in the dark. Or they might be driven to do some exploration of their own due to a healthy curiosity about sex—after all, it is a natural force of nature, it is innate.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
no one knows how our girls will turn out to be. but certainly, educating their moral values from young is important. teaching them to protect their sacred bodies is crucial.
through many stories, we learnt that girls who 'abuse' their body rights tend to be those who felt unloved and experience no protection at home. hence, they are constantly on the outside searching for men to love them....hopping from one to another and consequently, trading in their moral values for that 'imaginative' love moments!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A giggly schoolgirl of only 14, who should be hanging out with peers doing carefree stuff like shopping, sleepovers and makeovers—should NOT have to bear the ordeal of giving birth to a stillborn. But this was exactly what happened to a 14-year-old girl in Malaysia. Believe it or not, it was not her first experience, at this tender age.
4 abortions at 14...
The teenage girl, who still lives with her parents in a shophouse at Pulau Meranti, admitted to having not one, but four abortions. Which makes you wonder, where she went to get those complicated procedures done. How did she get the money? What were her “extra-curricular activities” like?
Her parents found her looking pale and weak one evening. Then they were astonished and alarmed to find their child bleeding profusely. They actually informed a close relative who then lodged a police report.
Upon arrival and inspection, the police found a stillborn baby in a yellow plastic bag, stashed away in the girl’s bedroom. After some questioning, the girl admitted to giving birth to the baby and then to have had four previous pregnancies prior to this one.
How could the parents not have noticed their little girl getting pregnant, not once, but four times? When did she start having sex to have had four abortions already?
Supt. Imran Abdul Rahman, Sepang OCPD, confirmed that police are investigating this case.
Abortion laws....
Like every other country, Singapore has laid down some ground rules too, when it comes to abortion. Here, it is legal to have an abortion on socio-medical grounds. The law states that there is no defined age limit and no legal requirement for parental consent for minors to get the abortion procedure done. However, abortion is prohibited after 24 weeks (6 months) of pregnancy, unless the mother’s life is in danger.
The Singapore Abortion Act also states that girls under 16 years of age have to go through a mandatory counselling session at the Health Promotion Board Counselling Centre. After the session, they will be issued a Certificate of Attendance (COA) – without the cert, abortion will not be legally permissible. A 48-hour waiting period after counselling is mandatory before the procedure can be carried out. Just so that reflection can be done—the worst thing is to regret after having a life taken out of you. There is no turning the clock back.
How well do you know your child?
We parents think that we know all there is to know about our children. What could our kids be hiding from us? Apparently, judging from the case above, the teen concealed a baby bump – and quite successfully for four times.
Talk to your kids about sex; educate them. It is better for them to know than to live in the dark. Or they might be driven to do some exploration of their own due to a healthy curiosity about sex—after all, it is a natural force of nature, it is innate.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
no one knows how our girls will turn out to be. but certainly, educating their moral values from young is important. teaching them to protect their sacred bodies is crucial.
through many stories, we learnt that girls who 'abuse' their body rights tend to be those who felt unloved and experience no protection at home. hence, they are constantly on the outside searching for men to love them....hopping from one to another and consequently, trading in their moral values for that 'imaginative' love moments!
Friday, October 28, 2011
mum dies so baby could live!
another good article that i have read. sharing with all....
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They say there is no comparison to a mother’s love. Stacie Crimm, a mum from Oklahoma gave up her life just so her unborn baby could live, shows us that there is no dispute to that statement.
Ask anyone what their definition of hero is and you’d probably get something that Hollywood has conjured up.
Heroes who are carved out of fantasy and lore, heroes who are made — one retake after another on a studio lot somewhere…heroes who have no relevance to our lives whatsoever. But today, we found a real-life hero whose life is indeed worth making a movie out of.
Darkness looms
Faced with the knowledge that only chemotherapy would save her from terminal neck cancer, newly-pregnant Stacie Crimm, made the ultimate sacrifice. The 41-year-old, who had been told by doctors she would never be able to conceive a child, decided to refuse the treatment so that her unborn daughter could live instead.
Stacie was able to survive for five months before being forced to deliver Dottie Mae, weighing just 2lbs 1oz, by Caesarian section – and even managed to hold her on one occasion before succumbing to the disease three days later.
‘This baby was everything she had ever wanted in this world,’ Stacie’s brother Ray Phillips said in an interview with local newspaper, the Oklahoman.
It was he that Stacie had called in March when she received the delightful news that she was pregnant after years of thinking she was infertile. But strange things started happening to Stacie over the next couple of days.
Her happiness over the unexpected news was plagued with severe headaches and double vision, while tremors struck every inch of her body. She couldn’t tell for sure what was happening to her, but she was astute enough to be worried.
“I’m worried about this baby,” she wrote in a text to her brother.
“I hope I live long enough to have this baby,” said another message.
The messages grew more desperate as the pain grew worst; “Bubba, if anything happens to me, you take this child.”
Stacie was no longer with the father of the baby and would have raised her daughter as a single mother if she survived.
A heroic sacrifice
Not able to prolong her fears anymore, Stacie finally went through a series of health checks and finally, a CAT scan revealed that she had head and neck cancer. The doctors told her that the cancer cells were rapidly progressing and that if she wanted to live at all, she needed to start the chemotherapy sessions as soon as possible.
Problem was, the chemotherapy will ruin the miracle baby she was carrying in her womb. She had to do what no would-be mother should ever have to – - chose between her life and that of her baby’s.
It was an easy decision.
Ray told the Oklahoman that his sister waived the potentially lifesaving chemotherapy in hope that she would eventually hold a healthy baby in her arms. Then on August 16, Stacie collapsed at her home in Ryan, Oklahoma and was rushed to OU Medical Center in Oklahoma City.
Doctors said the invasive tumour had begun wrapping around the brain stem. Two days later the baby’s heart rate plummeted, followed by the courageous mum’s. Doctors and nurses rushed to her aid and decided a C-section was the baby’s only chance.
Dottie Mae arrived into the world weighing less than a third an average newborn. She was quickly taken to neonatal intensive care, while her mother was placed in intensive care in another building. Stacie fought back and managed to wrestle herself off the ventilator and sedation after a few days.
But the cancer had crossed one of her eyes and destroyed the muscle behind her eye. It had paralysed her throat so that when she did talk, it was hard to understand. Stacie was too weak to even be taken to her baby, and her baby was too weak to be brought to her.
“We’d show her pictures and she would cry and she would want to hold her baby,” said Ray.
“It was quite the ordeal. I felt helpless. I wanted to help her, I wanted to do what I could for her – we all did – but they had told us it was impossible for her to see the child”.
On September 8, Stacie stopped breathing and once again was resuscitated. Hospital staff warned the family that she was very close to death.
Seeing how close Stacie was to death, the nurses decided to let her hold the baby she gave up her life for. Stacie held her baby for the first and last time with the help of the nurses for she did not have the energy to do it on her own.
Holding the baby she died for. Also picture; Stacie's brother and sister. (Source: Dailymail.co.uk)
She died three days later. Her funeral was held on September 14.
Dottie Mae now lives with Ray, his wife Jennifer and their four children in their Oklahoma City home.
Unconditional love
What Stacie did was truly heroic and a true testament to the unconditional love a mother bore bears for her child. Mothers around the world have applauded her decision with comments such as;
“I would have done anything for my son, from the day I found out I was pregnant until the day that I die.”
“I admire this woman for doing this for her daughter, and I would do the same in a heartbeat! Whether I had a choice or not!” by a reader of The Stir.
Candace from the US wrote on the DailyMail.com forum:
“I wish all people could value a child’s life as much as she has. Her daughter will one day be touched to know how much she was absolutely cherished by her mother.”
“Death cannot break the bonds of love.”
Another reader wrote on the same site; “At least Dottie will grow up know her mum was a hero.”
And we agree.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
They say there is no comparison to a mother’s love. Stacie Crimm, a mum from Oklahoma gave up her life just so her unborn baby could live, shows us that there is no dispute to that statement.
Ask anyone what their definition of hero is and you’d probably get something that Hollywood has conjured up.
Heroes who are carved out of fantasy and lore, heroes who are made — one retake after another on a studio lot somewhere…heroes who have no relevance to our lives whatsoever. But today, we found a real-life hero whose life is indeed worth making a movie out of.
Darkness looms
Faced with the knowledge that only chemotherapy would save her from terminal neck cancer, newly-pregnant Stacie Crimm, made the ultimate sacrifice. The 41-year-old, who had been told by doctors she would never be able to conceive a child, decided to refuse the treatment so that her unborn daughter could live instead.
Stacie was able to survive for five months before being forced to deliver Dottie Mae, weighing just 2lbs 1oz, by Caesarian section – and even managed to hold her on one occasion before succumbing to the disease three days later.
‘This baby was everything she had ever wanted in this world,’ Stacie’s brother Ray Phillips said in an interview with local newspaper, the Oklahoman.
It was he that Stacie had called in March when she received the delightful news that she was pregnant after years of thinking she was infertile. But strange things started happening to Stacie over the next couple of days.
Her happiness over the unexpected news was plagued with severe headaches and double vision, while tremors struck every inch of her body. She couldn’t tell for sure what was happening to her, but she was astute enough to be worried.
“I’m worried about this baby,” she wrote in a text to her brother.
“I hope I live long enough to have this baby,” said another message.
The messages grew more desperate as the pain grew worst; “Bubba, if anything happens to me, you take this child.”
Stacie was no longer with the father of the baby and would have raised her daughter as a single mother if she survived.
A heroic sacrifice
Not able to prolong her fears anymore, Stacie finally went through a series of health checks and finally, a CAT scan revealed that she had head and neck cancer. The doctors told her that the cancer cells were rapidly progressing and that if she wanted to live at all, she needed to start the chemotherapy sessions as soon as possible.
Problem was, the chemotherapy will ruin the miracle baby she was carrying in her womb. She had to do what no would-be mother should ever have to – - chose between her life and that of her baby’s.
It was an easy decision.
Ray told the Oklahoman that his sister waived the potentially lifesaving chemotherapy in hope that she would eventually hold a healthy baby in her arms. Then on August 16, Stacie collapsed at her home in Ryan, Oklahoma and was rushed to OU Medical Center in Oklahoma City.
Doctors said the invasive tumour had begun wrapping around the brain stem. Two days later the baby’s heart rate plummeted, followed by the courageous mum’s. Doctors and nurses rushed to her aid and decided a C-section was the baby’s only chance.
Dottie Mae arrived into the world weighing less than a third an average newborn. She was quickly taken to neonatal intensive care, while her mother was placed in intensive care in another building. Stacie fought back and managed to wrestle herself off the ventilator and sedation after a few days.
But the cancer had crossed one of her eyes and destroyed the muscle behind her eye. It had paralysed her throat so that when she did talk, it was hard to understand. Stacie was too weak to even be taken to her baby, and her baby was too weak to be brought to her.
“We’d show her pictures and she would cry and she would want to hold her baby,” said Ray.
“It was quite the ordeal. I felt helpless. I wanted to help her, I wanted to do what I could for her – we all did – but they had told us it was impossible for her to see the child”.
On September 8, Stacie stopped breathing and once again was resuscitated. Hospital staff warned the family that she was very close to death.
Seeing how close Stacie was to death, the nurses decided to let her hold the baby she gave up her life for. Stacie held her baby for the first and last time with the help of the nurses for she did not have the energy to do it on her own.
Holding the baby she died for. Also picture; Stacie's brother and sister. (Source: Dailymail.co.uk)
She died three days later. Her funeral was held on September 14.
Dottie Mae now lives with Ray, his wife Jennifer and their four children in their Oklahoma City home.
Unconditional love
What Stacie did was truly heroic and a true testament to the unconditional love a mother bore bears for her child. Mothers around the world have applauded her decision with comments such as;
“I would have done anything for my son, from the day I found out I was pregnant until the day that I die.”
“I admire this woman for doing this for her daughter, and I would do the same in a heartbeat! Whether I had a choice or not!” by a reader of The Stir.
Candace from the US wrote on the DailyMail.com forum:
“I wish all people could value a child’s life as much as she has. Her daughter will one day be touched to know how much she was absolutely cherished by her mother.”
“Death cannot break the bonds of love.”
Another reader wrote on the same site; “At least Dottie will grow up know her mum was a hero.”
And we agree.
Do you believe in true love?
here's a story that i read...reproducing it lock, stock, barrel.....
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Married couple of 72 years, died holding hands
Most people no longer take the wedding vow “Till death do us part” seriously anymore...but not Norma and Gordon Yeager who died while holding hands after being with each other for 72 years. They don’t make love like this anymore...
They lived together, they loved together and after four children and 72 years of marriage, they died while holding hands. This is Norma and Gordon Yeager’s remarkable story of love in a time when rampant stories of bitter divorces have clouded our perception of true love.
A love like this....
Norma Stock had only just graduated high school when she accepted Gordon Yeager’s marriage proposal.The couple got married in Iowa on a spring day in 1939 and went on to have four children together.
Things are not always rosy and smooth for the lovebirds…but they persevered through personal times of turmoil as well as the dangers that came with living through the horror that was World War II.
The way their children tell it, Gordon was the life of the party and Norma was his rock who was always by his side — supporting him in ways that only a devoted wife could. Norma rarely left Gordon’s side in all the 72 years that they have been together.
“They just loved being together,” their son Dennis Yeager told reporters.
“Everybody argues once in awhile, but [my dad still says] ‘I have to stick around. I can’t go until she does because I have to stay here for her and she would say the same thing.”
As with every other aspect of their lives, Norma and Gordon passed on together…while holding hands.
Two hearts beating as one.
The car accident happened near the couple’s home in State Center, Iowa. Gordon, 94, had failed to yield to an oncoming car at a stop sign, and the two vehicles collided. The passengers of the other car were also taken to the hospital with injuries but the Yeagers were in worse shape.
“They brought them in the same room in intensive care and put them together — and they were holding hands in ICU. They were not really responsive” recalled Dennis.
The nurses who attended them know better than to separate the couple. Gordon died at 3:38PM holding hands with his wife while being surround by their family and loved ones.
“It was really strange, they were holding hands, and dad stopped breathing but I couldn’t figure out what was going on because the heart monitor was still going.”
“But we were like, he isn’t breathing. How does he still have a heart beat?”
“The nurse checked and said that’s because they were holding hands and it’s going through them. Her heart was beating through him and picking it up,” said Dennis.
Exactly one hour after Gordon died, Norma passed on too. She was 90-years-old at the time of her passing.
“Neither one of them would’ve wanted to be without each other,” their daughter Donna Sheets said.
“We were very blessed, honestly, that they went this way.”
At their funeral on Monday, Norma and Gordon were still holding hands. Their family plans to cremate them by mixing their ashes, to preserve their memory as a couple who never gave up on each other, a couple that was in it for the long-haul.
Now…where did we put that box of tissues?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Married couple of 72 years, died holding hands
Most people no longer take the wedding vow “Till death do us part” seriously anymore...but not Norma and Gordon Yeager who died while holding hands after being with each other for 72 years. They don’t make love like this anymore...
They lived together, they loved together and after four children and 72 years of marriage, they died while holding hands. This is Norma and Gordon Yeager’s remarkable story of love in a time when rampant stories of bitter divorces have clouded our perception of true love.
A love like this....
Norma Stock had only just graduated high school when she accepted Gordon Yeager’s marriage proposal.The couple got married in Iowa on a spring day in 1939 and went on to have four children together.
Things are not always rosy and smooth for the lovebirds…but they persevered through personal times of turmoil as well as the dangers that came with living through the horror that was World War II.
The way their children tell it, Gordon was the life of the party and Norma was his rock who was always by his side — supporting him in ways that only a devoted wife could. Norma rarely left Gordon’s side in all the 72 years that they have been together.
“They just loved being together,” their son Dennis Yeager told reporters.
“Everybody argues once in awhile, but [my dad still says] ‘I have to stick around. I can’t go until she does because I have to stay here for her and she would say the same thing.”
As with every other aspect of their lives, Norma and Gordon passed on together…while holding hands.
Two hearts beating as one.
The car accident happened near the couple’s home in State Center, Iowa. Gordon, 94, had failed to yield to an oncoming car at a stop sign, and the two vehicles collided. The passengers of the other car were also taken to the hospital with injuries but the Yeagers were in worse shape.
“They brought them in the same room in intensive care and put them together — and they were holding hands in ICU. They were not really responsive” recalled Dennis.
The nurses who attended them know better than to separate the couple. Gordon died at 3:38PM holding hands with his wife while being surround by their family and loved ones.
“It was really strange, they were holding hands, and dad stopped breathing but I couldn’t figure out what was going on because the heart monitor was still going.”
“But we were like, he isn’t breathing. How does he still have a heart beat?”
“The nurse checked and said that’s because they were holding hands and it’s going through them. Her heart was beating through him and picking it up,” said Dennis.
Exactly one hour after Gordon died, Norma passed on too. She was 90-years-old at the time of her passing.
“Neither one of them would’ve wanted to be without each other,” their daughter Donna Sheets said.
“We were very blessed, honestly, that they went this way.”
At their funeral on Monday, Norma and Gordon were still holding hands. Their family plans to cremate them by mixing their ashes, to preserve their memory as a couple who never gave up on each other, a couple that was in it for the long-haul.
Now…where did we put that box of tissues?
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
maid's issue
i spoke to a brief acquaintance.
finally, she had her domestic helper sent back to philippines.
another case of broken trust, after many weeks of tolerance and she decided to stop trying to 'coach' and 'counsel' the helper.
the filipino helper came to her place and often complained of being unwell. a detailed examination revealed that she has some 'unclean' disease, which needed to be treated with some expensive medicine. the employer paid on her behalf.
the helper had an issue with physical fitness. for 2 weeks or so, she 'claimed' that she was not able to work, so a part-time helper was recruited while the full-time helper rests in her room. how ironical!
to me, she was taking advantage of the goodness of the female employer. coz' i was told, she would get up when she knws that the male employer returns home from work. i was quite pissed off upon hearing such behaviour of the maid.
anyway, it was good riddance after a couple of weeks of endurance by the female employer. in my opinion, why keep someone who's not fit to carry out her duties?
it's really not easy finding a helper who can work well in a household. i'm beginning to appreciate mine at home, who's still teachable and is of a softer personality. the only worry is that, she's young and seems gullible. so, granting her off might pose hazards to my employment....but keeping her at home all weekends is also not a good alternative.
while her contract requires no off day for her, i hv started granting her a rest day on mthly basis (min) and hopes that she will make full use of her time to attend mosque session, make good friends and learn sth worthwhile.
but my hubby just reminded me,"hmm....we hv to get prepared that we will not have a maid one day!" he meant, if anything wayward happens to this current one, we are likely to be left stranded and not wanting to take further risks in getting a new one!
finally, she had her domestic helper sent back to philippines.
another case of broken trust, after many weeks of tolerance and she decided to stop trying to 'coach' and 'counsel' the helper.
the filipino helper came to her place and often complained of being unwell. a detailed examination revealed that she has some 'unclean' disease, which needed to be treated with some expensive medicine. the employer paid on her behalf.
the helper had an issue with physical fitness. for 2 weeks or so, she 'claimed' that she was not able to work, so a part-time helper was recruited while the full-time helper rests in her room. how ironical!
to me, she was taking advantage of the goodness of the female employer. coz' i was told, she would get up when she knws that the male employer returns home from work. i was quite pissed off upon hearing such behaviour of the maid.
anyway, it was good riddance after a couple of weeks of endurance by the female employer. in my opinion, why keep someone who's not fit to carry out her duties?
it's really not easy finding a helper who can work well in a household. i'm beginning to appreciate mine at home, who's still teachable and is of a softer personality. the only worry is that, she's young and seems gullible. so, granting her off might pose hazards to my employment....but keeping her at home all weekends is also not a good alternative.
while her contract requires no off day for her, i hv started granting her a rest day on mthly basis (min) and hopes that she will make full use of her time to attend mosque session, make good friends and learn sth worthwhile.
but my hubby just reminded me,"hmm....we hv to get prepared that we will not have a maid one day!" he meant, if anything wayward happens to this current one, we are likely to be left stranded and not wanting to take further risks in getting a new one!
university admission
hubby and i went for a talk in joy's jc re uni admission.
joy was seated besides me, busy fiddling with her mobile, though she insisted that she was paying attention.
i enquired on paper, the minimum admission grades critera for business course in smu and nus. the result was, it would be safer to get all distinctions to guarantee urself a place.
after the talk, joy proclaimed that she was more inspired to study to meet her goals. well, for me, life's getting tough for the stdts these days, in terms of securing a place in the uni. stds are raised, in part due to increased competition from foreign immigrants!
she has checked with her dance friend from smu about the study envt there. turned out that she was being discouraged by that friend, mainly quoting reason of over-loaded projects and presentation work.
well, hubby and i believe that the uni envt is a place that helps the kids to mature and develop broader thinking skills. ultimately, it's good to have a basic degree to fall back on, even if the kids are not going to pursue the area of study after graduation.
i do agree, office work turns boring after some years. and competition will drive one crazy. it's really letting the kids choose a path of life that he enjoys that will be long-lasting.
joy was seated besides me, busy fiddling with her mobile, though she insisted that she was paying attention.
i enquired on paper, the minimum admission grades critera for business course in smu and nus. the result was, it would be safer to get all distinctions to guarantee urself a place.
after the talk, joy proclaimed that she was more inspired to study to meet her goals. well, for me, life's getting tough for the stdts these days, in terms of securing a place in the uni. stds are raised, in part due to increased competition from foreign immigrants!
she has checked with her dance friend from smu about the study envt there. turned out that she was being discouraged by that friend, mainly quoting reason of over-loaded projects and presentation work.
well, hubby and i believe that the uni envt is a place that helps the kids to mature and develop broader thinking skills. ultimately, it's good to have a basic degree to fall back on, even if the kids are not going to pursue the area of study after graduation.
i do agree, office work turns boring after some years. and competition will drive one crazy. it's really letting the kids choose a path of life that he enjoys that will be long-lasting.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
being teased?
i was picking claire up from sch in late morn.
suddenly, i saw her dash across the road with her friend. mind u, she wasnt using the zebra crossing too! this act would hv been punished by her discipline master, who happened not to be there!
while witnessing her dashing act, i heard some boys calling her 'claire aw, claire aw'!
she must hv got too 'excited' over boys calling her that she lost her 'sensibility' to perform the right things.
these days, her mind seems to be somewhere else!
i joined her at my car and gave her a mild scolding, telling her that i was wrong to cross the road without looking at the car turning out from the junction. she might hv been knocked down from the way she had dashed across!
she was embarassed esp knowing that those boys who teased her were just across the other road, probably watching her beng reprimanded!
i asked,'who are those boys? are they from ur class?'
she responded,"i dunno. can't really see from far!"
see what i meant by an elusive character?
well, being teased boys is common occurrence for me in sch lah....maybe that would make many girls' blood pressure rise and get her hormonal balance upset, but to me, 'sensibility' must be maintained!
aye, i actually told her,"how to even trust u to go home on ur own, now that i've witnessed ur dashing act, with a lil teasing from boys!'
the boys just hv a way to get into the girls' moods, isn't it? haha....what else can i do but to laugh it off?
suddenly, i saw her dash across the road with her friend. mind u, she wasnt using the zebra crossing too! this act would hv been punished by her discipline master, who happened not to be there!
while witnessing her dashing act, i heard some boys calling her 'claire aw, claire aw'!
she must hv got too 'excited' over boys calling her that she lost her 'sensibility' to perform the right things.
these days, her mind seems to be somewhere else!
i joined her at my car and gave her a mild scolding, telling her that i was wrong to cross the road without looking at the car turning out from the junction. she might hv been knocked down from the way she had dashed across!
she was embarassed esp knowing that those boys who teased her were just across the other road, probably watching her beng reprimanded!
i asked,'who are those boys? are they from ur class?'
she responded,"i dunno. can't really see from far!"
see what i meant by an elusive character?
well, being teased boys is common occurrence for me in sch lah....maybe that would make many girls' blood pressure rise and get her hormonal balance upset, but to me, 'sensibility' must be maintained!
aye, i actually told her,"how to even trust u to go home on ur own, now that i've witnessed ur dashing act, with a lil teasing from boys!'
the boys just hv a way to get into the girls' moods, isn't it? haha....what else can i do but to laugh it off?
a big trantrum that left me a sore throat!
finally, i threw a big tantrum with claire yesterday.
the nite before on tues, i told every one that i was probably coming down with an 'unwell' state. in fact, i was feeling quite frusco and uncomfortable. claire even asked,"mommy, is it ur winter period?"
wow, i hv nearly forgotten this seasonal word that i used with her last yr...thks for reminding me.
yesterday, 1 day after her 11th bdae celeb party with some frds back home, i treated her like an independent girl, asking her to do all necessary revision for english, esp those sections which she was weaker in.
she was her usual 'dreamy' self....throughout the time that i was home, all i saw was some flipping of pages of past worksheets done, then interrupted by reading her archie's comics (received as bdae present)....i had to remind her to 'transfer' her seat to a proper table, instead of always slouching on the sofa, imitating joy.
正所谓，上梁不正下梁歪！
finally, in the night at 7plus, after her return from a play session, with perspiration dripping, she was holding on to her comics book again! that was really an eyesore to me!
i looked at her with rage, hoping that she would take the initiative to go for her shower!
apparently, my 'deliberate stares' were taken frivolously by the 'concerned party'.
there went the volcanic eruption......it spewed hot ashes and wasnt' able to cease for the rest of the night!
surely, claire didnt have a good night thereafter...lectures, shouting, scolding and sitting down to doing necessary work, she had it all!
i always tell her,"i'm not concerned if u pass or fail! but i mind that u grow up not being productive and ignore the proper values to learn....if u attitude is good, u will naturally good harvest!"
basically, claire succumbed to distraction esaily. things that don't interest her, she will deliberately choose not to pay attention to it. she's probably stretching her comics reading time to the maximum...joy was all sympathetic seeing that i lost my 'cool' and told me to just leave her to survive and manage on her own!
in fact, i had little to do with her revision. i would hv expected her to come checking stuff with me, but she seemed to put up a front that she's all ready! yet, i still caught her in making very random errors in the familiar stuff!
i passed a comment at joy,"our generation was so much a better lot...no tuition. everything was our own respy, from dunno to knwing it! nowadays, all resources are provided for and yet, no attn to details is paid and repeated mistakes are made! horrible lot!"
finally, she got some work done. the point is not to get high marks, really.
it's really having the maturity to learn one's stuff, knowing its importance and putting aside all other 'temptations' like i-touch, facebook, reading....i was citing joanna, mebelle and natalie, her 3 cousins who are so independent in their work.
claire, look twds all this good behaviour and learn it!
she tends to take things in her stride, with no urgency, unlike joy and me! characteristics of blood O vs blood A group?
the nite before on tues, i told every one that i was probably coming down with an 'unwell' state. in fact, i was feeling quite frusco and uncomfortable. claire even asked,"mommy, is it ur winter period?"
wow, i hv nearly forgotten this seasonal word that i used with her last yr...thks for reminding me.
yesterday, 1 day after her 11th bdae celeb party with some frds back home, i treated her like an independent girl, asking her to do all necessary revision for english, esp those sections which she was weaker in.
she was her usual 'dreamy' self....throughout the time that i was home, all i saw was some flipping of pages of past worksheets done, then interrupted by reading her archie's comics (received as bdae present)....i had to remind her to 'transfer' her seat to a proper table, instead of always slouching on the sofa, imitating joy.
正所谓，上梁不正下梁歪！
finally, in the night at 7plus, after her return from a play session, with perspiration dripping, she was holding on to her comics book again! that was really an eyesore to me!
i looked at her with rage, hoping that she would take the initiative to go for her shower!
apparently, my 'deliberate stares' were taken frivolously by the 'concerned party'.
there went the volcanic eruption......it spewed hot ashes and wasnt' able to cease for the rest of the night!
surely, claire didnt have a good night thereafter...lectures, shouting, scolding and sitting down to doing necessary work, she had it all!
i always tell her,"i'm not concerned if u pass or fail! but i mind that u grow up not being productive and ignore the proper values to learn....if u attitude is good, u will naturally good harvest!"
basically, claire succumbed to distraction esaily. things that don't interest her, she will deliberately choose not to pay attention to it. she's probably stretching her comics reading time to the maximum...joy was all sympathetic seeing that i lost my 'cool' and told me to just leave her to survive and manage on her own!
in fact, i had little to do with her revision. i would hv expected her to come checking stuff with me, but she seemed to put up a front that she's all ready! yet, i still caught her in making very random errors in the familiar stuff!
i passed a comment at joy,"our generation was so much a better lot...no tuition. everything was our own respy, from dunno to knwing it! nowadays, all resources are provided for and yet, no attn to details is paid and repeated mistakes are made! horrible lot!"
finally, she got some work done. the point is not to get high marks, really.
it's really having the maturity to learn one's stuff, knowing its importance and putting aside all other 'temptations' like i-touch, facebook, reading....i was citing joanna, mebelle and natalie, her 3 cousins who are so independent in their work.
claire, look twds all this good behaviour and learn it!
she tends to take things in her stride, with no urgency, unlike joy and me! characteristics of blood O vs blood A group?
gillian's wedding - 15th oct 2011
venue: shangrila rasa sentosa
weather : humid
well, what was the best part about the wedding? for the kids, they would claim the photo booth, esp the 4 cuzzies, claire, jo, belle and meg. in fact, they took so many good shots but chose to keep them quietly (rather than display them on the bride's album for memory).
hubby and myself hv to sit apart from the 2 girls, coz' of logistics issue? li and chin also ended up sitting at another table. surely, the sisters would hv hoped to sit together for the nite. at the end of it, joy 'lamented' that she missed our presence. surely, she had missed the 'lame teasing' from her daddy, i guess!
food was average.
jenny, the mother-in-law was stunningly pretty. her grey gown and hairdo was better than the morn church wedding's. we ended up sitting with her childhood friends and it was interesting to hear exchange of conversation amongst them in hokkien dialect.
the only pity was that the bridegroom and bride were invited by the bridegroom's family on stage to offer a toast, leaving the bride's parents 'off stage'...i found that a little strange. shouldnt it be unison of 2 families' affairs?
anyway, i had great conversation with mano too! to me, he's a man who takes things in great stride, never worrying about the unnecessary. he cited that he would never skip good food on earth just to stay healthy. his belief is to take necessary (min) medication and still enjoy good food. how does that sound to every one?
he said that his greatest worry is jean cos' he's more senior than her. it was touching to knw that a man cares enough to plan for the woman's future. but many a times, women just need the 'soft touch' from a man, and not just money talk, haha. venus and mars creatures can never see eye-to-eye lah, so fret no more, that's my philosophy! be thankful that we hv our other half with us to share all joy and woes.
well, looking at the newly-wed couple, everything seemed so perfect. but deep in my heart, i knw that marriage path is not a bed of roses. it takes many yrs for each one of us to learn to accept our other halves and be contented and happy.
the only saga that happened during the wedding was my fil's drunken state. apparently, he drank so much with one of the grandsons that he had a bad headache. aye, i wonder, if he was just too excited over the event.
the dinner wasnt filling. hubby and i were left hungry...but then again, for the sake of jenny and peter, it was all worth it!
weather : humid
well, what was the best part about the wedding? for the kids, they would claim the photo booth, esp the 4 cuzzies, claire, jo, belle and meg. in fact, they took so many good shots but chose to keep them quietly (rather than display them on the bride's album for memory).
hubby and myself hv to sit apart from the 2 girls, coz' of logistics issue? li and chin also ended up sitting at another table. surely, the sisters would hv hoped to sit together for the nite. at the end of it, joy 'lamented' that she missed our presence. surely, she had missed the 'lame teasing' from her daddy, i guess!
food was average.
jenny, the mother-in-law was stunningly pretty. her grey gown and hairdo was better than the morn church wedding's. we ended up sitting with her childhood friends and it was interesting to hear exchange of conversation amongst them in hokkien dialect.
the only pity was that the bridegroom and bride were invited by the bridegroom's family on stage to offer a toast, leaving the bride's parents 'off stage'...i found that a little strange. shouldnt it be unison of 2 families' affairs?
anyway, i had great conversation with mano too! to me, he's a man who takes things in great stride, never worrying about the unnecessary. he cited that he would never skip good food on earth just to stay healthy. his belief is to take necessary (min) medication and still enjoy good food. how does that sound to every one?
he said that his greatest worry is jean cos' he's more senior than her. it was touching to knw that a man cares enough to plan for the woman's future. but many a times, women just need the 'soft touch' from a man, and not just money talk, haha. venus and mars creatures can never see eye-to-eye lah, so fret no more, that's my philosophy! be thankful that we hv our other half with us to share all joy and woes.
well, looking at the newly-wed couple, everything seemed so perfect. but deep in my heart, i knw that marriage path is not a bed of roses. it takes many yrs for each one of us to learn to accept our other halves and be contented and happy.
the only saga that happened during the wedding was my fil's drunken state. apparently, he drank so much with one of the grandsons that he had a bad headache. aye, i wonder, if he was just too excited over the event.
the dinner wasnt filling. hubby and i were left hungry...but then again, for the sake of jenny and peter, it was all worth it!
is strict parenting stifling for the child's growth?
claire had a small 11th bdae celeb this week.
6 friends attended her party at my place. girls in all shapes and height were present right before me.
one korean girl told me,"aunty, i can't take chicken or pork. coz' i'm on a 3-mth medication to grow tall, and this medicine forbids me from taking poultry meat. i can only take fish and beef!"
so, i had to make tempura prawn in crepe for her, which she enjoyed. all enjoyed the creamy sauce sphaghetti too!
one girl,z approached me to call her daddy to extend her stay at my place.
she has been ordered to reach home by 1.30 pm via public bus. reason: to revise for her coming exams. so, the phone line was connected.
me: hello, is that mr boh?
he: yes, who's that?
me: oh, i'm claire's mother. we plan to cut the cake at 2 plus, so can ur daughter stay for the party a little while later?
he: (paused for a while) hmm...actually, i want her to come back now. she has to exercise some discipline!
me: (shocked and speechless with the word 'discipline') okay, what about if i let her eat the cake first and then send her home?
he: no, ask her to take a bus back on her own now.
i had to hand the phone back to her daughter, who was looking really upset to leave the party halfway, when the bunch of rowdy girls were having good fun!
without taking a bite of the bdae cake, i let her take home an 'awfully chocolate' cupcake as a substitute.
in the car, i asked z,"is ur home discipline very strict?"
z: ya! my dad always wants us to score 100 marks for exams. he always tells us that he achieved that standard when young and always topped the class!
me: (knowing it was just bullshit coz i hv used such tricks before) oh, i see. but it's quite difficult to score 100 marks, u knw?
so, the strict father had spoilt the fun for the young girl. she might appear obedient now, but it's just another few more yrs before she reaches that 'rebellious' age....in fact, this girl is very street-smart and quite well-liked by the teacher for being outspoken.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
next day, at school, z told claire, "when my parents chided me, i just told them 'it's not my problem, what! my friends wanted me to stay longer and refused to let me go!'"
when claire told me that, i was quite shocked. this girl has begun to put blame on other people in order to avoid the reprimand.....not a very good sign, in my opinion.
frankly, parents' concern over kids' well being and academic performance is understandable. but sths, being overly strict can be over-bearing for the kids. one thing i am certain about, such strict discipline can't work for long.
i would rather give the kids some peace in social life and make sure that they understand their boundaries and not find us over-controlling.
6 friends attended her party at my place. girls in all shapes and height were present right before me.
one korean girl told me,"aunty, i can't take chicken or pork. coz' i'm on a 3-mth medication to grow tall, and this medicine forbids me from taking poultry meat. i can only take fish and beef!"
so, i had to make tempura prawn in crepe for her, which she enjoyed. all enjoyed the creamy sauce sphaghetti too!
one girl,z approached me to call her daddy to extend her stay at my place.
she has been ordered to reach home by 1.30 pm via public bus. reason: to revise for her coming exams. so, the phone line was connected.
me: hello, is that mr boh?
he: yes, who's that?
me: oh, i'm claire's mother. we plan to cut the cake at 2 plus, so can ur daughter stay for the party a little while later?
he: (paused for a while) hmm...actually, i want her to come back now. she has to exercise some discipline!
me: (shocked and speechless with the word 'discipline') okay, what about if i let her eat the cake first and then send her home?
he: no, ask her to take a bus back on her own now.
i had to hand the phone back to her daughter, who was looking really upset to leave the party halfway, when the bunch of rowdy girls were having good fun!
without taking a bite of the bdae cake, i let her take home an 'awfully chocolate' cupcake as a substitute.
in the car, i asked z,"is ur home discipline very strict?"
z: ya! my dad always wants us to score 100 marks for exams. he always tells us that he achieved that standard when young and always topped the class!
me: (knowing it was just bullshit coz i hv used such tricks before) oh, i see. but it's quite difficult to score 100 marks, u knw?
so, the strict father had spoilt the fun for the young girl. she might appear obedient now, but it's just another few more yrs before she reaches that 'rebellious' age....in fact, this girl is very street-smart and quite well-liked by the teacher for being outspoken.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
next day, at school, z told claire, "when my parents chided me, i just told them 'it's not my problem, what! my friends wanted me to stay longer and refused to let me go!'"
when claire told me that, i was quite shocked. this girl has begun to put blame on other people in order to avoid the reprimand.....not a very good sign, in my opinion.
frankly, parents' concern over kids' well being and academic performance is understandable. but sths, being overly strict can be over-bearing for the kids. one thing i am certain about, such strict discipline can't work for long.
i would rather give the kids some peace in social life and make sure that they understand their boundaries and not find us over-controlling.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
kfc lunch
i was hanging loose ystdy with no teachings. wow, the feeling was terrific, not needing to attach my feelings to any stdts.
right aft sch, i picked up joy followed by claire, and off we went to parkway. i intended to buy claire a pair of shoes for this sat's wedding. in the end, it was joy who got a nice pair from charles and keith!
j, my helper tagged along too! she had told claire of her love for kfc chicken. she used to have it while working in malaysia.
so, that was a great chance to help her relive her memories of a fried chicken.
we went to kfc, each of us ordered a set and was gleefully tucking into our meal. together with the cheese fries, we must hv gained some kilos.
sometimes, i really wonder, for those who choose to diet, what's life's happiness about?
recently, i heard from my this 28-yr old lady of her diet switching only to juice and fruits, for the sake of losing some pounds. she has started looking prettier, after 2 changes made to her teeth and eyelid.....she has always wished for a good-looking man who's able to provide.
so, to her, looking slim will be the ultimate way to win a man.
considering how much she loves meat, it must be a torture to alter her diet, i reckon. but she said it was okay.
i even told her,"u r fine. the bone structure, we can't change. if a man truly loves u, he really wouldn't mind about some extra pounds on ur body...furthermore, ur face is already looking pretty!"
women are just so obssessed with their look, shapes and sizes.....maybe, it's a blessing that i'm born petite. this size does give some advantage when it comes dressing. this lady told me,"u see, u can stil wear ...dressing, i hope i can fit in too!"
but, dressing is really individual style. we just hv to find the right clothes for the wardrobe. feeling comfortable in the wear is the most impt, i reckon.
right aft sch, i picked up joy followed by claire, and off we went to parkway. i intended to buy claire a pair of shoes for this sat's wedding. in the end, it was joy who got a nice pair from charles and keith!
j, my helper tagged along too! she had told claire of her love for kfc chicken. she used to have it while working in malaysia.
so, that was a great chance to help her relive her memories of a fried chicken.
we went to kfc, each of us ordered a set and was gleefully tucking into our meal. together with the cheese fries, we must hv gained some kilos.
sometimes, i really wonder, for those who choose to diet, what's life's happiness about?
recently, i heard from my this 28-yr old lady of her diet switching only to juice and fruits, for the sake of losing some pounds. she has started looking prettier, after 2 changes made to her teeth and eyelid.....she has always wished for a good-looking man who's able to provide.
so, to her, looking slim will be the ultimate way to win a man.
considering how much she loves meat, it must be a torture to alter her diet, i reckon. but she said it was okay.
i even told her,"u r fine. the bone structure, we can't change. if a man truly loves u, he really wouldn't mind about some extra pounds on ur body...furthermore, ur face is already looking pretty!"
women are just so obssessed with their look, shapes and sizes.....maybe, it's a blessing that i'm born petite. this size does give some advantage when it comes dressing. this lady told me,"u see, u can stil wear ...dressing, i hope i can fit in too!"
but, dressing is really individual style. we just hv to find the right clothes for the wardrobe. feeling comfortable in the wear is the most impt, i reckon.
good life mommy!
joy was sick on tues morn. sore throat and muscles strain. she complained that she couldn't lift her hands to wash her face.
sounded uncanny but that's precisely how my girl is like. pampered princess lor.
i brought her to the doc, in fact, i had to hold her to escort her in, lest her strained muscles gave way, and she couldn't hold her stature upright, haha.
after the doc, we went to shop and save to top up some grocery.
passing by the coffee shop, she asked,"mommy, these pple got very good life leh!" (well, pardon her for her singlish; she just refused to change her style of speaking. i couldn't tahan it already!)
me: they are mostly retired folks or homemakers who could spare the time her drinking coffee, that's all!
j: r u one of them?
me: well, u knw my morn hours are more flexible, so i will probably be one of those drinking milo on one of the days!
j: wow, i dun mind having ur life leh! so relaxed.
me: joy, when i was working hard and being thrown left and right, were u even aware of it. u hv to understand that, in life, it's 先苦后甜！
well, that's the issue with young pple nowadays. everyone fights to have his sweet slice of cake, before even taking a plunge into hardship.
one thing i'm sure about, if joy were to hv my kind of life, she will sure go out of control and start piling on weight. afterall, she's such a food lover! in fact, she always said,"mom, dun cook good food for me leh. i can nvr lose wt!"
yet, each day back from sch, she will ask as a matter-of-factly,"hey mom, what are we having for dinner tonight!" how ironical!
sounded uncanny but that's precisely how my girl is like. pampered princess lor.
i brought her to the doc, in fact, i had to hold her to escort her in, lest her strained muscles gave way, and she couldn't hold her stature upright, haha.
after the doc, we went to shop and save to top up some grocery.
passing by the coffee shop, she asked,"mommy, these pple got very good life leh!" (well, pardon her for her singlish; she just refused to change her style of speaking. i couldn't tahan it already!)
me: they are mostly retired folks or homemakers who could spare the time her drinking coffee, that's all!
j: r u one of them?
me: well, u knw my morn hours are more flexible, so i will probably be one of those drinking milo on one of the days!
j: wow, i dun mind having ur life leh! so relaxed.
me: joy, when i was working hard and being thrown left and right, were u even aware of it. u hv to understand that, in life, it's 先苦后甜！
well, that's the issue with young pple nowadays. everyone fights to have his sweet slice of cake, before even taking a plunge into hardship.
one thing i'm sure about, if joy were to hv my kind of life, she will sure go out of control and start piling on weight. afterall, she's such a food lover! in fact, she always said,"mom, dun cook good food for me leh. i can nvr lose wt!"
yet, each day back from sch, she will ask as a matter-of-factly,"hey mom, what are we having for dinner tonight!" how ironical!
fat thigh msucles
in the car. joy and me having a conversation.
j: mom, i'm so sad, u knw?
me: why?
j: look at my fat thigh muscles. it's the result of too much dancing.
me: what's wrong? they look fine to me?
j: no...my thigh and calves were of better shape before. but, now they look so thick!
me: would u prefer wobbly flesh hanging loose then?
j: actually, i dun mind leh!
aye, joy is of this age that is particularly sensitive with her appearance. her hair, her complexion, her boobie size, her pelvic bone structure and now, to add on her FAT thigh muscles.
i proposed,"well, if u stop dancing altogether, u will lose all the muscles and then, u will stop complaining!"
guess, that worked with her coz i heard no more gripes.
i often tell my 2 girls, " u r so fortunate to be born with pretty features and hv the love of a family. look at those kids with cleft palate and low mental ability..."
both acknowleged that they r blessed kids....still, it's just human nature to ask for more!
considering where joy was coming from when she was a fat chubby girl, she's already looking slim and pretty these days. so, i hv no idea what the complaint was all about!
千万要记住，知足常乐哦！
j: mom, i'm so sad, u knw?
me: why?
j: look at my fat thigh muscles. it's the result of too much dancing.
me: what's wrong? they look fine to me?
j: no...my thigh and calves were of better shape before. but, now they look so thick!
me: would u prefer wobbly flesh hanging loose then?
j: actually, i dun mind leh!
aye, joy is of this age that is particularly sensitive with her appearance. her hair, her complexion, her boobie size, her pelvic bone structure and now, to add on her FAT thigh muscles.
i proposed,"well, if u stop dancing altogether, u will lose all the muscles and then, u will stop complaining!"
guess, that worked with her coz i heard no more gripes.
i often tell my 2 girls, " u r so fortunate to be born with pretty features and hv the love of a family. look at those kids with cleft palate and low mental ability..."
both acknowleged that they r blessed kids....still, it's just human nature to ask for more!
considering where joy was coming from when she was a fat chubby girl, she's already looking slim and pretty these days. so, i hv no idea what the complaint was all about!
千万要记住，知足常乐哦！
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
bonding with children
i read somewhere that ' we should bond with our children when they are young else, we hv to pay for counselling sessions when they are older!"
this is a thought-provoking statement.
but it distinctly reflects how important it is for parents to invest time in their kids when they are young, obedient and easy to manage.
my niece, nini is the best example. at 2 plus, she will seek permission from her parents to carry out a task. and if mommy said,"no", she would stop short at that!
when kids trsnsform into teenies and then, teenagehood, they started to take pride and ownership in making their own decisions. worse still, if we dun impart the right values from young, they would find communication with the older folks difficult.
take for instance, over the itinerary proposal of joy, the daddy had 'critized' about the shoddy piece of work, citing that lil effort has been put into the work. she actually felt sad over his comment and wasnt too happy about it.
i had to intervene the next day, explaining the situation to her. "dad has been doing the hol planning for us for many yrs. he knws what's a serious proposal. so, no way can u fool him with ur sloppy presentation! he's absolutely rite to question u about the city placing, the express route to take and the travelling time..."
in fact, i told joy that in her future corporate life, she will be facing setbacks every other moment, when proposals get thrown out and efforts ended up not being appreciated. so, taking criticism in good spirit form is the first step to future success!
on the other side, i hv to tell hubby that he should be thkful that his daughter took up the respy to plan, even though her 1st and 2nd round had not met his expectation. but, at least joy is trying and he should not be too critical....well, i'm poor in road map like joy, so i understand her 'woes' to some extent lah.
well ,at least, joy learnt one thing from this whole planning experience, everything starts from reading the map of taiwan.....she should hv obeyed red right from the start! well, it's nvr too late lah!
this is a thought-provoking statement.
but it distinctly reflects how important it is for parents to invest time in their kids when they are young, obedient and easy to manage.
my niece, nini is the best example. at 2 plus, she will seek permission from her parents to carry out a task. and if mommy said,"no", she would stop short at that!
when kids trsnsform into teenies and then, teenagehood, they started to take pride and ownership in making their own decisions. worse still, if we dun impart the right values from young, they would find communication with the older folks difficult.
take for instance, over the itinerary proposal of joy, the daddy had 'critized' about the shoddy piece of work, citing that lil effort has been put into the work. she actually felt sad over his comment and wasnt too happy about it.
i had to intervene the next day, explaining the situation to her. "dad has been doing the hol planning for us for many yrs. he knws what's a serious proposal. so, no way can u fool him with ur sloppy presentation! he's absolutely rite to question u about the city placing, the express route to take and the travelling time..."
in fact, i told joy that in her future corporate life, she will be facing setbacks every other moment, when proposals get thrown out and efforts ended up not being appreciated. so, taking criticism in good spirit form is the first step to future success!
on the other side, i hv to tell hubby that he should be thkful that his daughter took up the respy to plan, even though her 1st and 2nd round had not met his expectation. but, at least joy is trying and he should not be too critical....well, i'm poor in road map like joy, so i understand her 'woes' to some extent lah.
well ,at least, joy learnt one thing from this whole planning experience, everything starts from reading the map of taiwan.....she should hv obeyed red right from the start! well, it's nvr too late lah!
saga over fried fish fillet
i was really mad at dinner time on tues nite....couldn't even finish my rice and dishes.
my helper, j had 'defied' my order of using the tempura flour to fry sutchi fillet pieces. in its stead, she had used another flour type, citing that she wished to finish the remainder powder in the packet!
but, the standard of the fried fish was just terrible - lousy and salty!
even joy, who's a 'chin chye' eater also commented about its saltiness!
so, j ended up being scolded by me. when i' m enraged, i really roar like a lioness..and white certainly doesn't need to tell me that such roar works!
ystday (wed), i called my helper to be down at lobby in 3 mins' time to help me carry stuff. she was nowhere in sight when i arrived to park my car. managing the load of marketing stuff myself, i appeared at the doorway....scolding her again!
she told me that she couldn't hear me well and had sms-ed me as such,"mom sori i come dwn now!' hey, did it even make sense?
my point was clear, anything not sure, plse clarify on the spot; on the phone. sms me for what? did she really think that i hv so much time checking lame msgs while driving, and managing a loadful of grocery items?
i started roaring.....and made her tell me what i detest.
basically, the point was clear. this is my household. i'm most particular about preparing the right food for my family members. instructions are given by me, she's only to amend my order only with my consent. in other words, she has no authority to alter my instruction without my prior knowledge.
sths, it's impt to let our counterpart knw what is 'taboo' in her area of work. holding initiative in job is great, but if the outcome of her own decision sucks, she has to take responsibility.
call me fussy or whatever, but i'm particular about what i feed into pple's mouth.
i actually told her,"just when i'm beginning to believe and trust in u more, u destroy ur own bonus!" she kept apologising, "sorry, mom!"
well, basically, i hv offered to pay her lil bonus at 3rd, 6th and 9th mth to motivate her to work well...so, this is the 9th mth and with such incident and prior cases of my missing T-shirt, i think i probably hv to hold back....if i dun teach and educate now, it will be even harder when she turns into 老油条！
but what i like about her is that, she's emotionally strong and won't cry over slightest things! well, a strong front is required to take on employer's reprimand session!
my helper, j had 'defied' my order of using the tempura flour to fry sutchi fillet pieces. in its stead, she had used another flour type, citing that she wished to finish the remainder powder in the packet!
but, the standard of the fried fish was just terrible - lousy and salty!
even joy, who's a 'chin chye' eater also commented about its saltiness!
so, j ended up being scolded by me. when i' m enraged, i really roar like a lioness..and white certainly doesn't need to tell me that such roar works!
ystday (wed), i called my helper to be down at lobby in 3 mins' time to help me carry stuff. she was nowhere in sight when i arrived to park my car. managing the load of marketing stuff myself, i appeared at the doorway....scolding her again!
she told me that she couldn't hear me well and had sms-ed me as such,"mom sori i come dwn now!' hey, did it even make sense?
my point was clear, anything not sure, plse clarify on the spot; on the phone. sms me for what? did she really think that i hv so much time checking lame msgs while driving, and managing a loadful of grocery items?
i started roaring.....and made her tell me what i detest.
basically, the point was clear. this is my household. i'm most particular about preparing the right food for my family members. instructions are given by me, she's only to amend my order only with my consent. in other words, she has no authority to alter my instruction without my prior knowledge.
sths, it's impt to let our counterpart knw what is 'taboo' in her area of work. holding initiative in job is great, but if the outcome of her own decision sucks, she has to take responsibility.
call me fussy or whatever, but i'm particular about what i feed into pple's mouth.
i actually told her,"just when i'm beginning to believe and trust in u more, u destroy ur own bonus!" she kept apologising, "sorry, mom!"
well, basically, i hv offered to pay her lil bonus at 3rd, 6th and 9th mth to motivate her to work well...so, this is the 9th mth and with such incident and prior cases of my missing T-shirt, i think i probably hv to hold back....if i dun teach and educate now, it will be even harder when she turns into 老油条！
but what i like about her is that, she's emotionally strong and won't cry over slightest things! well, a strong front is required to take on employer's reprimand session!
joy's taiwan itinerary
finally, joy was putting time to plan for our taiwan trip.
for the first time, she bothered to study the map of taiwan and did some homework check about different places!
well, i commented,"joy, u refused to take heed of what qinyi advised u some wks ago, that planning a trip starts with knowing the map orientation!"
to her, it was just putting in activities that she wishes to do, disregarding the route path, the time taken for the travel....so, it was with a harsh 'lesson' with dad (who threw out her proposal) that she was finally awakened!
this micro view of her is clearly demonstrated in her recent GP essay writing too, topic was about 'technology - the advs and disadvs that it brings to society'. she wrote quite a fair bit, but the teacher commented that she lacked the macro perspective (eg. influence on medical research, green globalisation etc).
actually, many advice of the older folks fall on deaf ears of teenagers these days. they live in their own styles, disregard useful advice and tend to correct themselves, only if they hit the wall and end up with cemented nose!
but on the whole, i was telling hubby, do give joy the credit for taking the initiative to check out on many things on the internet...it's not an easy job. but it really made me appreciate what HE was doing for the family all these yrs. i must say, hubby is good PLANNER, we are probably the stimulus behind his work.
but age and bz work schedule are catching up with him....so, let the younger generation take over lah!
for the first time, she bothered to study the map of taiwan and did some homework check about different places!
well, i commented,"joy, u refused to take heed of what qinyi advised u some wks ago, that planning a trip starts with knowing the map orientation!"
to her, it was just putting in activities that she wishes to do, disregarding the route path, the time taken for the travel....so, it was with a harsh 'lesson' with dad (who threw out her proposal) that she was finally awakened!
this micro view of her is clearly demonstrated in her recent GP essay writing too, topic was about 'technology - the advs and disadvs that it brings to society'. she wrote quite a fair bit, but the teacher commented that she lacked the macro perspective (eg. influence on medical research, green globalisation etc).
actually, many advice of the older folks fall on deaf ears of teenagers these days. they live in their own styles, disregard useful advice and tend to correct themselves, only if they hit the wall and end up with cemented nose!
but on the whole, i was telling hubby, do give joy the credit for taking the initiative to check out on many things on the internet...it's not an easy job. but it really made me appreciate what HE was doing for the family all these yrs. i must say, hubby is good PLANNER, we are probably the stimulus behind his work.
but age and bz work schedule are catching up with him....so, let the younger generation take over lah!
Monday, October 10, 2011
lingni's 过大礼日子
8th oct 2011.
it was my cousin's big day of wedding betrothal gifts presentation.
my mom was invited to be at aunty plum's place to help out in the social talk and 还礼习俗！ i wanted to give my support too.
at 8.30 am, i arrived at their flat. i sneaked into the lift quickly and guess what, it was the bridgegroom and 2 other companions.
i asked,"rbr me?"
he said,"ya, of coz!"
then, i was so stupid to ask,"ur parents?"
his reply really embarassed me a little,"erm..my aunty and my cousin!"
u see, i hv no idea that the bridegroom's parents were not supposed to be present for such occasion. next, i should hv studied the age of the male cousin, he's definitely much younger than me (since i soon learnt that his kid is only 5 yrs off)....maybe, my eyes werent awakened yet at that hour, haha!
while at plum aunty's place, she looked so flustered in manner and must be really thankful that my mom was there to calm the atmosphere....and showing her the way to the custom's practice!
i was totally amazed to hear the bridegroom speaking hainanese with his aunty and male cousin...they told me that they come from a very closely-knit family with grandparents living in the same house...ya, that really makes a difference when it comes to kids learning their dialects.
the bridegroom even conversed with the mother-in-law in hainanese and that really put the latter at ease, haha.
well, it's nice to have in-laws who can speak the same dialect, that adds a lot more of closeness and warmth to a relationship.
i went in to the room to join mom and aunty plum. they were deciding how much to take as dowry. aunty commented that her hubby(ie bride's father) felt that a token could be accepted to rhyme with the soon-to-marry daughter as 家里的千金!
soon, it was the finale. the guests left and aunty plum was again bz sorting out the cakes and canned food into bags, ready for distribution. she was all perspiration and told me that she didn't sleep a wink the night before....this aunty plum always stresses herself easily. partly due to her overly responsible character and partly becoz this is the 1st time she is becoming a mom-in-law!
mom and i proceeded to tampines giant for bfst, followed by grocery shopping. both of us seemed to hv same interest in buying food stuff for the family. it was a good time spent on sat morn.
i promised to take her to eastpoint to buy a good pair of shoes for lingni's wedding!
it was my cousin's big day of wedding betrothal gifts presentation.
my mom was invited to be at aunty plum's place to help out in the social talk and 还礼习俗！ i wanted to give my support too.
at 8.30 am, i arrived at their flat. i sneaked into the lift quickly and guess what, it was the bridgegroom and 2 other companions.
i asked,"rbr me?"
he said,"ya, of coz!"
then, i was so stupid to ask,"ur parents?"
his reply really embarassed me a little,"erm..my aunty and my cousin!"
u see, i hv no idea that the bridegroom's parents were not supposed to be present for such occasion. next, i should hv studied the age of the male cousin, he's definitely much younger than me (since i soon learnt that his kid is only 5 yrs off)....maybe, my eyes werent awakened yet at that hour, haha!
while at plum aunty's place, she looked so flustered in manner and must be really thankful that my mom was there to calm the atmosphere....and showing her the way to the custom's practice!
i was totally amazed to hear the bridegroom speaking hainanese with his aunty and male cousin...they told me that they come from a very closely-knit family with grandparents living in the same house...ya, that really makes a difference when it comes to kids learning their dialects.
the bridegroom even conversed with the mother-in-law in hainanese and that really put the latter at ease, haha.
well, it's nice to have in-laws who can speak the same dialect, that adds a lot more of closeness and warmth to a relationship.
i went in to the room to join mom and aunty plum. they were deciding how much to take as dowry. aunty commented that her hubby(ie bride's father) felt that a token could be accepted to rhyme with the soon-to-marry daughter as 家里的千金!
soon, it was the finale. the guests left and aunty plum was again bz sorting out the cakes and canned food into bags, ready for distribution. she was all perspiration and told me that she didn't sleep a wink the night before....this aunty plum always stresses herself easily. partly due to her overly responsible character and partly becoz this is the 1st time she is becoming a mom-in-law!
mom and i proceeded to tampines giant for bfst, followed by grocery shopping. both of us seemed to hv same interest in buying food stuff for the family. it was a good time spent on sat morn.
i promised to take her to eastpoint to buy a good pair of shoes for lingni's wedding!
blur sotong!
my conversation with helper, j.
me: j, can u please make sure that u close my bottle cap tight? yesterday, the water nearly spilt out coz' the water lid was not tighten fully!
j: (with a dazed look) mom, i didn't do it! i think you filled up ur own water bottle yesterday!
me: huh, u mean it was me? ok, but plse rbr to close it tight for the kids too!
i was glad that my tone twds her was kind and unraged, else it would really have been quite an embarassing moment.
so, blur sotong i was!
but the lesson learnt was: always rbr the incident details well and dun jump to conclusion and scold in liberal manner.
me: j, can u please make sure that u close my bottle cap tight? yesterday, the water nearly spilt out coz' the water lid was not tighten fully!
j: (with a dazed look) mom, i didn't do it! i think you filled up ur own water bottle yesterday!
me: huh, u mean it was me? ok, but plse rbr to close it tight for the kids too!
i was glad that my tone twds her was kind and unraged, else it would really have been quite an embarassing moment.
so, blur sotong i was!
but the lesson learnt was: always rbr the incident details well and dun jump to conclusion and scold in liberal manner.
Sunday, October 9, 2011
the love of 阿公
while having my afternoon nap, claire interrupted my sleep,"mommy, 阿公calling u!"
with eyes half open, i answered the call.
阿公was so sweet to ask if joy needed more of the herbs to clear off her facial acnes.
well, he had actually bought some herbs for her 2 mths back, after seeing her terrible acnes on one gathering occasion, and was full of sympathy for this granddaughter.
the herbs are supposed to clear off the tozins in her body and restore her facial youth.
she drank the boiled herbs and is today, looking pretty again.
she joked with me,"mommy, if 阿公 sees me, he will think that his herbs work wonder, haha! actually, my skin renewal is a combination of other products too, like a good facial and using the right pdts!"
well, i told her how fortunate she is to have the love and care of an old folk, who actually bothers to buy stuff for her....and that she must appreciate his effort.
in fact, the last time that the grandpa bought her these herbs, i reminded her umpteen times to call personally to express thks. first, it was exams prep excuse, then others...one day, i had to scold her so badly that she finally 'succumbed' and called him to say thks. but to me, it was not genuinely done right from the beginning...and it was not good!
anyway, joy is having another facial tmrw and i hope she will be all confident to face the crowd this sat....God bless her, i am sure!
btw, both of us are talking about 'how to look slimmer' for the occasion....we both feel so VERY fat, man! i am serious. my weight has breached 50kg and her differential with mine has not narrowed, got it, folks?
with eyes half open, i answered the call.
阿公was so sweet to ask if joy needed more of the herbs to clear off her facial acnes.
well, he had actually bought some herbs for her 2 mths back, after seeing her terrible acnes on one gathering occasion, and was full of sympathy for this granddaughter.
the herbs are supposed to clear off the tozins in her body and restore her facial youth.
she drank the boiled herbs and is today, looking pretty again.
she joked with me,"mommy, if 阿公 sees me, he will think that his herbs work wonder, haha! actually, my skin renewal is a combination of other products too, like a good facial and using the right pdts!"
well, i told her how fortunate she is to have the love and care of an old folk, who actually bothers to buy stuff for her....and that she must appreciate his effort.
in fact, the last time that the grandpa bought her these herbs, i reminded her umpteen times to call personally to express thks. first, it was exams prep excuse, then others...one day, i had to scold her so badly that she finally 'succumbed' and called him to say thks. but to me, it was not genuinely done right from the beginning...and it was not good!
anyway, joy is having another facial tmrw and i hope she will be all confident to face the crowd this sat....God bless her, i am sure!
btw, both of us are talking about 'how to look slimmer' for the occasion....we both feel so VERY fat, man! i am serious. my weight has breached 50kg and her differential with mine has not narrowed, got it, folks?
a visit to jenny's place
6 days before gillian's wedding, jenny was all excited when we visited her yesterday.
firstly, peter was so kind to blend ABC juice for us. for the first time, i tasted beetroot. it was really refreshing and able to quench my thirst right away. knowing the heavy content of vitamin in beetroot, i knw i will start training joy to take this juice, together with apple and carrot.
i had the fortune to see jenny's beautiful grey-coloured gown with a nice attached lil sash. a matching colour bag is to accompany her gown. she should look fabulous with her complete make-up and hairdo on that day, with the courtesy of gillian's artiste.
gillian confirmed that the wedding will start at 9 apm punctual which means that we would hv no reason to be late, despite the early hour which is a real challenge for hubby (who tends to sleep in on weekends).
gillian had a bridal shower party last sat with pete's family. she showed us an album 'churned out' by her bunch of close cousins, with pics from birth till the current ones. the writing therein exuded love and warmth, something that money cannot buy.
she showed me her beautiful blue wedding gown for the night, one with very sexy back plunging line that will reveal her nice back.
there's sth original about her wedding nite reception too. a photo booth will be set up by her cousins which is meant for the guests (i should think the younger teenies') to take polaroid pics with the props available there. these pics are not meant to be taken home..well, u shall see on the actual day!
jenny and peter have even booked a room for themselves and will welcome the relative guests to join in the fun....wow, we are now full of expectation.
more importantly, we hv jean and mano's attendance in this joyous occasion...they are flying in today and we are looking fwd to a party gathering session.....cocktail, anyone?
firstly, peter was so kind to blend ABC juice for us. for the first time, i tasted beetroot. it was really refreshing and able to quench my thirst right away. knowing the heavy content of vitamin in beetroot, i knw i will start training joy to take this juice, together with apple and carrot.
i had the fortune to see jenny's beautiful grey-coloured gown with a nice attached lil sash. a matching colour bag is to accompany her gown. she should look fabulous with her complete make-up and hairdo on that day, with the courtesy of gillian's artiste.
gillian confirmed that the wedding will start at 9 apm punctual which means that we would hv no reason to be late, despite the early hour which is a real challenge for hubby (who tends to sleep in on weekends).
gillian had a bridal shower party last sat with pete's family. she showed us an album 'churned out' by her bunch of close cousins, with pics from birth till the current ones. the writing therein exuded love and warmth, something that money cannot buy.
she showed me her beautiful blue wedding gown for the night, one with very sexy back plunging line that will reveal her nice back.
there's sth original about her wedding nite reception too. a photo booth will be set up by her cousins which is meant for the guests (i should think the younger teenies') to take polaroid pics with the props available there. these pics are not meant to be taken home..well, u shall see on the actual day!
jenny and peter have even booked a room for themselves and will welcome the relative guests to join in the fun....wow, we are now full of expectation.
more importantly, we hv jean and mano's attendance in this joyous occasion...they are flying in today and we are looking fwd to a party gathering session.....cocktail, anyone?
a great day for claire!
other than a fun-filled children's day party at church, claire also enjoyed her afternoon dance in the studio with joy and others.
apparently, it was joy's turn to demonstrate her choreograph dance for next yr's concert (shortlisting success rate is 33% only). basically, she had to stand right in front of a class of 20 or more to show her steps and teach the rest...voting will be conducted at end of the viewing conducted over many weeks, and the successful candidate will get the chance to 'showcase' her dance at 2012 concert.
joy was so sweet to rope in claire to participate in the video presentation, that was shot and sent to the stdts ahead of her demonstration session. joy's intention was to boost up claire's confidence and at the same time, hopeful that claire would be selected to dance with her as well. she introduced claire to do a couple of cartwheels to start the session, which was a piece of cake for the younger girl.
after the lesson, JOY was beaming with joy and pride that she thought her choreo went well. it was fun,easy and acceptable by most stdts. more importantly, the coach realised that claire could actually dance better than her normal show in the class, and actually gave her words of compliment. the other stdts also applauded when they saw claire do her cartwheels. haha, how many pple can actually do ONE-HAND cartwheel at 180 degree turn? few, i reckon.
so, over the short session of choreo, claire sort of rose to 'stardom' which resulted in her grinning from ear to ear. this was despite her homework not finished and she hasn't even revised for her composition exam on mon (ie. today).
when i told her that she wasn't productive on sat, wasting much time in doing non-eseential stuff, she quickly responded in a sweet manner,"ya, mom, i knw i was non-productive. i promise u this will not happen again! i will do my best when i get home!"
well, as i told hubby, a kid's mood is really the main determinant of her behaviour. when she's 'stroked' and feel on cloud nine, even the meanest taunting will not get her into a rage.....
well, with her, i guess she has to learn along the way. joy even commented that claire is very 'cool' about exams, ie. not taking them too seriously. in fact, we have never seen her sitting there like a 12-hr statue to revise her work....she can tell u,"i'm done with reading my compo writing!" yup, and that's over a matter of 5 minutes......
anyway, this girl is eating a lot more and joy is totally envious of her 'ability' to stay slim. we brought her to see a doc at 8 plus coz' she seemd to be very uncomfortable with blocked nose. in fact, her nose mucus was turning thick yellowish and that worried us a little.
well, let's hope this week with all paper 1 stuff will pass by quickly.....and we will be on the way to celebrate gillian's wedding on 15th oct, sat.
apparently, it was joy's turn to demonstrate her choreograph dance for next yr's concert (shortlisting success rate is 33% only). basically, she had to stand right in front of a class of 20 or more to show her steps and teach the rest...voting will be conducted at end of the viewing conducted over many weeks, and the successful candidate will get the chance to 'showcase' her dance at 2012 concert.
joy was so sweet to rope in claire to participate in the video presentation, that was shot and sent to the stdts ahead of her demonstration session. joy's intention was to boost up claire's confidence and at the same time, hopeful that claire would be selected to dance with her as well. she introduced claire to do a couple of cartwheels to start the session, which was a piece of cake for the younger girl.
after the lesson, JOY was beaming with joy and pride that she thought her choreo went well. it was fun,easy and acceptable by most stdts. more importantly, the coach realised that claire could actually dance better than her normal show in the class, and actually gave her words of compliment. the other stdts also applauded when they saw claire do her cartwheels. haha, how many pple can actually do ONE-HAND cartwheel at 180 degree turn? few, i reckon.
so, over the short session of choreo, claire sort of rose to 'stardom' which resulted in her grinning from ear to ear. this was despite her homework not finished and she hasn't even revised for her composition exam on mon (ie. today).
when i told her that she wasn't productive on sat, wasting much time in doing non-eseential stuff, she quickly responded in a sweet manner,"ya, mom, i knw i was non-productive. i promise u this will not happen again! i will do my best when i get home!"
well, as i told hubby, a kid's mood is really the main determinant of her behaviour. when she's 'stroked' and feel on cloud nine, even the meanest taunting will not get her into a rage.....
well, with her, i guess she has to learn along the way. joy even commented that claire is very 'cool' about exams, ie. not taking them too seriously. in fact, we have never seen her sitting there like a 12-hr statue to revise her work....she can tell u,"i'm done with reading my compo writing!" yup, and that's over a matter of 5 minutes......
anyway, this girl is eating a lot more and joy is totally envious of her 'ability' to stay slim. we brought her to see a doc at 8 plus coz' she seemd to be very uncomfortable with blocked nose. in fact, her nose mucus was turning thick yellowish and that worried us a little.
well, let's hope this week with all paper 1 stuff will pass by quickly.....and we will be on the way to celebrate gillian's wedding on 15th oct, sat.
blessed children's day-9 oct 2011
claire invited trisha and lucas to our church for a children's day party this morn.
joy and i decided to skip the main adult service to join in the children's group. partly also to help watch over white's young kids.
for the 1st time, joy finally witnessed how bold and spontaneous trisha was. she raised her hand, without any need of prompting (claire, r u reading this?), to participate in a game. the way she strutted out, haha, with such confidence!
her group came in first and she was given 3 chocolate bars. happily returning to her seat, joy and i had fun watching what went next.
guess what? it was lucas' turn to want to play the game, despite his young age. trisha, plus joy and me, escorted him to the game corner. he was slowly separating the color balls into different cups, while trisha kept her helping hands off....joy commented that trisha is really honest with playing games, unlike the typical kiasu behaviour of many singaporean kids, haha. even i was so tempted to help lucas to speed up his process...but resisted lah.
lucas' team won too and he gaily returned to his seat with 3 hershey chocolate bars. i teased him,"u want me to keep them for u?" he cleverly replied,"ah ah...it's not heavy lah, very light, i can put in my pockets!"
he skilfully tucked in one chocolate each into his left and right pocket of his shirt. i asked if he wanted me to help keep his 3rd bar, he said,"hmm...i still hv another pocket in my pants lah!"
ha, claire, there went ur chocolate bar down the drain. as for trisha, when she got hers, she willingly shared it with lucas and just chucked the other 2 remaining ones into her water bottle. white's 2 kids are really different in handling things, haha. the boy is smarter while the girl is a sweet innocent girl!
while joy and i were singing the songs in the dark with light sticks in hand, halfway, we spotted lucas using his light stick 'fighting' with 2 other boys...actually, they were the ones to 'lure' him out of his 'quiet den'...it was such a hilarious sight to see him blocking his attackers' blow with his different hand patterns, acting like a warrior. joy and i really laughed our heads off to see him so cute and innocent...and that smug look on his face!
in fact, i was really glad the 2 kids were sporty, when it came to singing session too, especially lucas. think he enjoyed the puppet show the most.
then came the finale... when one fellow member asked if anyone would like to accept jesus into their hearts. guess who did? haha, it was indeed trisha, the bold and spontaneous girl. i told joy,"maybe she thot they were asking for game participants!" joy asked,"mom, do u think trisha knws what she's in for? or maybe the holy spirit is leading her!" well, i chose to think so too!
so, she and few others were led into the 'sacred room' to say the sinner's prayer. trisha was scratching her legs with spluttering eyelashes while being talked to. when she was led into prayer, her eyes were supposedly closed. but when joy and i peeped at her from outside the glass door, we spotted her eyes slightly open to 'peep' around....another funny laughter from joy and me.
lastly, it was makan session. the kids had great time eating nuggets, sausages, fishballs, cakes/cupcakes....claire had 3 helpings while trisha, 2.
luas came back to our home to 'shit' it out, haha.
hubby teased trisha saying,"i will call u tonight to make sure that u say your prayer and amen!" she showed a helpless look, not knowing how to tacklet this uncle's lame attack.
more importantly, white had great time with spouse at roland's restaurant. she texted me thereafter, saying that she finally had time to eat slowly, not needing to take trouble to ensure that the kids ate first, but more importantly, she could order her own favourite dimsum...poor white! but, i was sure exhausted after the whole affair with 2 young kids!
joy and i decided to skip the main adult service to join in the children's group. partly also to help watch over white's young kids.
for the 1st time, joy finally witnessed how bold and spontaneous trisha was. she raised her hand, without any need of prompting (claire, r u reading this?), to participate in a game. the way she strutted out, haha, with such confidence!
her group came in first and she was given 3 chocolate bars. happily returning to her seat, joy and i had fun watching what went next.
guess what? it was lucas' turn to want to play the game, despite his young age. trisha, plus joy and me, escorted him to the game corner. he was slowly separating the color balls into different cups, while trisha kept her helping hands off....joy commented that trisha is really honest with playing games, unlike the typical kiasu behaviour of many singaporean kids, haha. even i was so tempted to help lucas to speed up his process...but resisted lah.
lucas' team won too and he gaily returned to his seat with 3 hershey chocolate bars. i teased him,"u want me to keep them for u?" he cleverly replied,"ah ah...it's not heavy lah, very light, i can put in my pockets!"
he skilfully tucked in one chocolate each into his left and right pocket of his shirt. i asked if he wanted me to help keep his 3rd bar, he said,"hmm...i still hv another pocket in my pants lah!"
ha, claire, there went ur chocolate bar down the drain. as for trisha, when she got hers, she willingly shared it with lucas and just chucked the other 2 remaining ones into her water bottle. white's 2 kids are really different in handling things, haha. the boy is smarter while the girl is a sweet innocent girl!
while joy and i were singing the songs in the dark with light sticks in hand, halfway, we spotted lucas using his light stick 'fighting' with 2 other boys...actually, they were the ones to 'lure' him out of his 'quiet den'...it was such a hilarious sight to see him blocking his attackers' blow with his different hand patterns, acting like a warrior. joy and i really laughed our heads off to see him so cute and innocent...and that smug look on his face!
in fact, i was really glad the 2 kids were sporty, when it came to singing session too, especially lucas. think he enjoyed the puppet show the most.
then came the finale... when one fellow member asked if anyone would like to accept jesus into their hearts. guess who did? haha, it was indeed trisha, the bold and spontaneous girl. i told joy,"maybe she thot they were asking for game participants!" joy asked,"mom, do u think trisha knws what she's in for? or maybe the holy spirit is leading her!" well, i chose to think so too!
so, she and few others were led into the 'sacred room' to say the sinner's prayer. trisha was scratching her legs with spluttering eyelashes while being talked to. when she was led into prayer, her eyes were supposedly closed. but when joy and i peeped at her from outside the glass door, we spotted her eyes slightly open to 'peep' around....another funny laughter from joy and me.
lastly, it was makan session. the kids had great time eating nuggets, sausages, fishballs, cakes/cupcakes....claire had 3 helpings while trisha, 2.
luas came back to our home to 'shit' it out, haha.
hubby teased trisha saying,"i will call u tonight to make sure that u say your prayer and amen!" she showed a helpless look, not knowing how to tacklet this uncle's lame attack.
more importantly, white had great time with spouse at roland's restaurant. she texted me thereafter, saying that she finally had time to eat slowly, not needing to take trouble to ensure that the kids ate first, but more importantly, she could order her own favourite dimsum...poor white! but, i was sure exhausted after the whole affair with 2 young kids!
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
claire's sports carnival today!
finally, it's claire's sports carnival day today.
she's to wake up at 6 am and be in sch before 6.30 am, before the gate closes on her (so reported by her to me last nite).
what's the big deal, if u might ask.
well, this yr, for the first time, she's in the dance representing her green house. it was upon invitation by another girl and it was with some consideration/ deliberation, that she decided to participate.
knowing her to be lil shy, it was a great booster for her to dance in front of pple. in fact, she was so encouraged after being openly complimented by the dance teacher-in-charge, that she suddenly turned so responsible twds the event.
yet, till tday, only joy has the luxury of watching (just once) the house dance....to me, must be those 'ra ra' dance that makes a lot of exaggerated noise.
hope this whole event will give her more confidence and bring her dance to a higher level.
well, every kid needs just that breakthrough level, right?
like how hubby put it the other day (in a comical/ sinister manner) : 要竖起大姆指！(result of his attendance of one parenting seminar with me).
frankly, who would mind being shown a thumb signal of 'very good'?
she's to wake up at 6 am and be in sch before 6.30 am, before the gate closes on her (so reported by her to me last nite).
what's the big deal, if u might ask.
well, this yr, for the first time, she's in the dance representing her green house. it was upon invitation by another girl and it was with some consideration/ deliberation, that she decided to participate.
knowing her to be lil shy, it was a great booster for her to dance in front of pple. in fact, she was so encouraged after being openly complimented by the dance teacher-in-charge, that she suddenly turned so responsible twds the event.
yet, till tday, only joy has the luxury of watching (just once) the house dance....to me, must be those 'ra ra' dance that makes a lot of exaggerated noise.
hope this whole event will give her more confidence and bring her dance to a higher level.
well, every kid needs just that breakthrough level, right?
like how hubby put it the other day (in a comical/ sinister manner) : 要竖起大姆指！(result of his attendance of one parenting seminar with me).
frankly, who would mind being shown a thumb signal of 'very good'?
sticky keys cost me...
thru red, i got hold of mr ang's contact no.
i required his svc on piano tuning.
joy's kawaii piano has many sticky keys. for the last 3 yrs, the tuner would just turn up at my door, sit thru for half and hour or more, then left with $50-60 without much complaint. yet, the sticky keys issue nvr got solved.
this time round, mr ang took the whole spare part back home to repair. plus tuning, the cost will come up to $400. he commented that's joy's piano is for beginners' learning and casually asked,"what grade is ur daughter learning now?"
i replied,"diploma!"
he expressed shock, since he thot the piano was really more suitable for just below lower grade learners. then, joy happened to pass by and gave me a smug look,as if telling me,"see, mom. i still managed to get good grades, despite learning on such lousy piano!"
in fact, this girl was so lame, citing that she would pick up a skill of playing sidebyside on 2 pianos, if we were to get her an extra one. this was the result of her watching a taiwan show perfce at popo's house last fri.
of coz not, joy. 1st issue, space constaint. 2nd issue, no money. 3rd issue, u will not be able to squeeze time to practise.
in fact, i will be happy if joy can squeeze out some time to read up more....until today, i'm still on same old issue...read more, learn more and enjoy the knwledge acquisition. dun study for exams sake, that's the most lame excuse to study.
anyway, hping that her piano keys will all be fine and i'll hear more melodious piano sound in my home, in a week's time.
i required his svc on piano tuning.
joy's kawaii piano has many sticky keys. for the last 3 yrs, the tuner would just turn up at my door, sit thru for half and hour or more, then left with $50-60 without much complaint. yet, the sticky keys issue nvr got solved.
this time round, mr ang took the whole spare part back home to repair. plus tuning, the cost will come up to $400. he commented that's joy's piano is for beginners' learning and casually asked,"what grade is ur daughter learning now?"
i replied,"diploma!"
he expressed shock, since he thot the piano was really more suitable for just below lower grade learners. then, joy happened to pass by and gave me a smug look,as if telling me,"see, mom. i still managed to get good grades, despite learning on such lousy piano!"
in fact, this girl was so lame, citing that she would pick up a skill of playing sidebyside on 2 pianos, if we were to get her an extra one. this was the result of her watching a taiwan show perfce at popo's house last fri.
of coz not, joy. 1st issue, space constaint. 2nd issue, no money. 3rd issue, u will not be able to squeeze time to practise.
in fact, i will be happy if joy can squeeze out some time to read up more....until today, i'm still on same old issue...read more, learn more and enjoy the knwledge acquisition. dun study for exams sake, that's the most lame excuse to study.
anyway, hping that her piano keys will all be fine and i'll hear more melodious piano sound in my home, in a week's time.
Sunday, October 2, 2011
teen's episode?
i was in the gym early this morn, after sending claire to school.
i met B couple whom i've not met for a long while.
mr B told me that their secondary sch grandson is putting up with them for 2 weeks, as the exams is round the corner.
out of curiosity, i asked why.
mr B 'leaked' out that the grandson's academic results hv slipped due to his pre-occupation with computer games. the parents are working and they have completely control of his involvement at home. so, they need to rope in the help of 'grandparents' to watch over him after sch hours.
mr B, the grandfather, said that his way of working with this boy is to be back home in the afternoon, to slowly 'talk him out' of the online games activities. to me, it's clearly addiction. aye, the power of virtual addiction is so horrific that it can erode one's normal lifestyle and upset one's body balance.
pulling the plug completely is a tad too harsh, so i guess it will be a long process of cajoling...hopefully, the young boy will come to senses.
in conclusion, every coin has 2 sides to it. if we lose balance in our usage, the gadget becomes a bane in our lives.....just ystday, hubby and i were just talking about how parents lost control of kids as they grow up and become masters of their own lives, defying orders and failing to appreciate the parents' provisions.
he commented that if the kids fail to respect him in any way, including taking things into their own hands for major affairs, he will go to the extent of 'disowning' them and 'boycotting' any formal ceremonies....to him, respect is in mutual form. to a certain extent, i agree with him!
i met B couple whom i've not met for a long while.
mr B told me that their secondary sch grandson is putting up with them for 2 weeks, as the exams is round the corner.
out of curiosity, i asked why.
mr B 'leaked' out that the grandson's academic results hv slipped due to his pre-occupation with computer games. the parents are working and they have completely control of his involvement at home. so, they need to rope in the help of 'grandparents' to watch over him after sch hours.
mr B, the grandfather, said that his way of working with this boy is to be back home in the afternoon, to slowly 'talk him out' of the online games activities. to me, it's clearly addiction. aye, the power of virtual addiction is so horrific that it can erode one's normal lifestyle and upset one's body balance.
pulling the plug completely is a tad too harsh, so i guess it will be a long process of cajoling...hopefully, the young boy will come to senses.
in conclusion, every coin has 2 sides to it. if we lose balance in our usage, the gadget becomes a bane in our lives.....just ystday, hubby and i were just talking about how parents lost control of kids as they grow up and become masters of their own lives, defying orders and failing to appreciate the parents' provisions.
he commented that if the kids fail to respect him in any way, including taking things into their own hands for major affairs, he will go to the extent of 'disowning' them and 'boycotting' any formal ceremonies....to him, respect is in mutual form. to a certain extent, i agree with him!
Saturday, October 1, 2011
johnny english reborn
johnny english reborn - nice show. unexpectedly nice.
now, rowan atkinson is my 'idol', haha. actually, he's really funny with his 'helpless' but 'cool' expression.
hubby and the 2 girls seemed to like it too.
i laughed a lot....over all silly scenes and 'mr bean's' innocent look.
it's a nice sat afternoon hiding in a big theatre with air-con.
we proceeded to arcade at great world. we were challenging a game of racing..claire ended up 1st, out of the blue. hubby 2nd. i was the 3rd.
the whole joke started when joy came patting my shoulder and asked,"u got last?"
i responded,"no, i was 3rd. i was wondering how u got to be the last!"
"no, i didn't play. so, u were the last!" answered joy.
aiya, so i was the last in the race....blur me again.
go watch this show. won't regret.
now, rowan atkinson is my 'idol', haha. actually, he's really funny with his 'helpless' but 'cool' expression.
hubby and the 2 girls seemed to like it too.
i laughed a lot....over all silly scenes and 'mr bean's' innocent look.
it's a nice sat afternoon hiding in a big theatre with air-con.
we proceeded to arcade at great world. we were challenging a game of racing..claire ended up 1st, out of the blue. hubby 2nd. i was the 3rd.
the whole joke started when joy came patting my shoulder and asked,"u got last?"
i responded,"no, i was 3rd. i was wondering how u got to be the last!"
"no, i didn't play. so, u were the last!" answered joy.
aiya, so i was the last in the race....blur me again.
go watch this show. won't regret.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
ugly singaporeans?
lily was sharing with me about her transit experience at one of the china airports.
she was in a tour group, a throng of 15 people. at the airport, they had stayed in teh queue but decided to wander off for a while to kill time. upon return, they saw a china-looking guy jumping queue, moving in front of their big group of 15.
when being questioned by a tour member, he raised his voice in a rude manner. then, lily was really pissed off and went forward to rationalise things with him. out came from his mouth,"u ugly singaporean. i'm also a singaporean!" i was told that he spoke with american slang too!
lily soon discovered that he's a chinese mainlander who has gotten his singaporean citizenship and has moved to america for further studies. with him was another china lady and his dad, probably.
lily's experience set us thinking of how the govt had granted citizenship to many foreigners who simply used singapore as an escalating board to move forward in lives. it also makes me realise (though i had realised it long ago) how impt it is for our people to behave well when we are abroad.
somehow, the impression that pple hv of singaporeans are not too pleasant too!
on a side note, lily was in shanghai and saw ugly behaviour of the shanghainess, how at the sink, they would just stretch their hands above yours to wash without any expression of embarassment or apology.
well, we singaporeans are probably more kiasu, that's all. till today, i still find the jap women the most gracious in their behaviours, not rushing nor hurrying, always able to give in to others first, in a queue.
well, behaviours certainly tell of a person's breed. so, let's behave.
she was in a tour group, a throng of 15 people. at the airport, they had stayed in teh queue but decided to wander off for a while to kill time. upon return, they saw a china-looking guy jumping queue, moving in front of their big group of 15.
when being questioned by a tour member, he raised his voice in a rude manner. then, lily was really pissed off and went forward to rationalise things with him. out came from his mouth,"u ugly singaporean. i'm also a singaporean!" i was told that he spoke with american slang too!
lily soon discovered that he's a chinese mainlander who has gotten his singaporean citizenship and has moved to america for further studies. with him was another china lady and his dad, probably.
lily's experience set us thinking of how the govt had granted citizenship to many foreigners who simply used singapore as an escalating board to move forward in lives. it also makes me realise (though i had realised it long ago) how impt it is for our people to behave well when we are abroad.
somehow, the impression that pple hv of singaporeans are not too pleasant too!
on a side note, lily was in shanghai and saw ugly behaviour of the shanghainess, how at the sink, they would just stretch their hands above yours to wash without any expression of embarassment or apology.
well, we singaporeans are probably more kiasu, that's all. till today, i still find the jap women the most gracious in their behaviours, not rushing nor hurrying, always able to give in to others first, in a queue.
well, behaviours certainly tell of a person's breed. so, let's behave.
Monday, September 26, 2011
independence vs moral support
i was reading wendy's blog about her 2 children taking 'o' level and 'psle' this yr.
yet, she has decided to travel with the hubby citing that the kids are supposed to be left independent in their work, after p4.
well, do i agree with her view? not fully.
in my opinion, my presence at home before the exams is not so much of pushing, nagging and sitting down with them like 陪读妈妈！it's more of moral support and for emergent standby role.
when kids knw that we are around, they will feel safe and peaceful. 安心can drive the kids to reach a great height. when they are hungry, i will prepare them a meal to warm their hearts. when they feel like releasing their stress through a badminton game or swim, i can be the one to accompany.
before long, they will grow up and fly independently. showering them with another few more yrs of attention and love (haha, not too much pampering, i hpe) will only help intensify the bond between us.
i swear that my 2 kids can share distinct memories of fun times that we had experienced while they were kids..... i am sure, their knowledge of us being the prime supporters of their growing yrs will make them feel loved.
only with love in their hearts would they be able to love others...a sermon that i heard of from church last sun. i totally agree with it.
yet, she has decided to travel with the hubby citing that the kids are supposed to be left independent in their work, after p4.
well, do i agree with her view? not fully.
in my opinion, my presence at home before the exams is not so much of pushing, nagging and sitting down with them like 陪读妈妈！it's more of moral support and for emergent standby role.
when kids knw that we are around, they will feel safe and peaceful. 安心can drive the kids to reach a great height. when they are hungry, i will prepare them a meal to warm their hearts. when they feel like releasing their stress through a badminton game or swim, i can be the one to accompany.
before long, they will grow up and fly independently. showering them with another few more yrs of attention and love (haha, not too much pampering, i hpe) will only help intensify the bond between us.
i swear that my 2 kids can share distinct memories of fun times that we had experienced while they were kids..... i am sure, their knowledge of us being the prime supporters of their growing yrs will make them feel loved.
only with love in their hearts would they be able to love others...a sermon that i heard of from church last sun. i totally agree with it.
lil conversation with claire
claire: mom, do u despise me? (haha, is this girl trying to impress me with the word 'despise'?)
me: of coz not! why do u ask such a question?
claire: becoz i'm not so focused and slow in my work.
me: that's not true, claire. u r not slow, rather u r just easily distracted and hence, takes a longer time to finish a piece of work. if u learn to put ur heart to ur work and disregard all noise, tv programs and electronic gadgets around u, u will be able to stay focused as well as joy and me!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
well, when i shared this with my hubby few hrs ago, he laughed heartily finding the whole episode very funny.
his only comment,"must be u telling her this and giving her the impression that she's not focused!"
yes, i might hv said it more than once recently!
like "claire, plse stay focused on ur work and quickly finish it up!"
or "see, joy can sit there like a statue to study!"
or "dun talk to me. i'm trying to finish up these math questions. i need concentration!"
well, that just goes to show that parents' words do hv great impact on the kids' mind. sth said with no intention to belittle, apparently has robbed her of some lil self-esteem.
now, i must think of how to 'repair' that lil 'hollow' to bring her self-esteem back.
hope i will be kinder in my words and not often reminding her of her 'spoken bad english'....must be the peers and the sch envt, i reckon.
well, even joy is not conscious of using proper english when she converses with pple.
her excuse,"i feel more comfortable that way. imagine if i speak perfect english with my dance frds, they will find it awkward. but dun worry lah mom, in front of teachers, i speak proper."
well, i ought to learn to trust joy's words. afterall, she always scores very high for her oral....so, i should compliment her for her 'versatile ability' to switch from broken to perfect english?
and for claire, i'm sure her esteem will be restored. afterall, how many times in a week do i hear joy telling her,"claire, i wish i can hv ur skin and legs..." i reckon, joy will include 'boobs' in the list soon.
hello everyone, u hear me?
me: of coz not! why do u ask such a question?
claire: becoz i'm not so focused and slow in my work.
me: that's not true, claire. u r not slow, rather u r just easily distracted and hence, takes a longer time to finish a piece of work. if u learn to put ur heart to ur work and disregard all noise, tv programs and electronic gadgets around u, u will be able to stay focused as well as joy and me!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
well, when i shared this with my hubby few hrs ago, he laughed heartily finding the whole episode very funny.
his only comment,"must be u telling her this and giving her the impression that she's not focused!"
yes, i might hv said it more than once recently!
like "claire, plse stay focused on ur work and quickly finish it up!"
or "see, joy can sit there like a statue to study!"
or "dun talk to me. i'm trying to finish up these math questions. i need concentration!"
well, that just goes to show that parents' words do hv great impact on the kids' mind. sth said with no intention to belittle, apparently has robbed her of some lil self-esteem.
now, i must think of how to 'repair' that lil 'hollow' to bring her self-esteem back.
hope i will be kinder in my words and not often reminding her of her 'spoken bad english'....must be the peers and the sch envt, i reckon.
well, even joy is not conscious of using proper english when she converses with pple.
her excuse,"i feel more comfortable that way. imagine if i speak perfect english with my dance frds, they will find it awkward. but dun worry lah mom, in front of teachers, i speak proper."
well, i ought to learn to trust joy's words. afterall, she always scores very high for her oral....so, i should compliment her for her 'versatile ability' to switch from broken to perfect english?
and for claire, i'm sure her esteem will be restored. afterall, how many times in a week do i hear joy telling her,"claire, i wish i can hv ur skin and legs..." i reckon, joy will include 'boobs' in the list soon.
hello everyone, u hear me?
lil conversation with joy
joy : mom, i'm going back to sch tmrw. think i should get some of my results! what happens if i need to get retained?
me(awe-struck and jaw dropped): huh?
joy: if i really need to be retained, i will find another option!
claire (interrupted): u mean go poly?
joy (with her bemused look): no lah, i will surely appeal and appeal until the sch allows me to be promoted!
me: should hv worked harder lor!
joy: i'm sure the sch will let me go to jc2. afterall, my midyr results werent that bad plus my 'o' level grades were good too!
me: plse lah, joy, all vjc stdts also get the same 'o' level results as u, what!
joy: no mom, not everybody got 6As, ok?
me (tongue-tied): hope for the best lah.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
well, joy has many areas to improve. i always say that this girl only works hard for exams purpose. other than that, it's 1 km distance away from the books and reading materials....how tragic.
to me, reading up and learning more should be part of everyday's life affairs. i hope she will realise the imptce of keeping to a more consistent learning schedule so that study is not just for exams sake.....
me(awe-struck and jaw dropped): huh?
joy: if i really need to be retained, i will find another option!
claire (interrupted): u mean go poly?
joy (with her bemused look): no lah, i will surely appeal and appeal until the sch allows me to be promoted!
me: should hv worked harder lor!
joy: i'm sure the sch will let me go to jc2. afterall, my midyr results werent that bad plus my 'o' level grades were good too!
me: plse lah, joy, all vjc stdts also get the same 'o' level results as u, what!
joy: no mom, not everybody got 6As, ok?
me (tongue-tied): hope for the best lah.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
well, joy has many areas to improve. i always say that this girl only works hard for exams purpose. other than that, it's 1 km distance away from the books and reading materials....how tragic.
to me, reading up and learning more should be part of everyday's life affairs. i hope she will realise the imptce of keeping to a more consistent learning schedule so that study is not just for exams sake.....
unfair treatment at workplace!
a brief acquaintance,B told me that she's quit her administration job. thk goodness though, she's found a new one.
as she was relating the unfair practice at work since the boss employed a foreign talent (filipino), she shed tears. she's in the 50s and the new worker is in late
20s.
she said,"the filipinos are crafty!"
it's again a case of office power play. but knowing B, she's a responsible worker. she was pissed off upon learning that the new worker is paid more than her but worked shorter hours than her. the latter blatantly showed that she's taking over her job and showed no respect for her 'seniority' and 'experience'.
aye, she mentioned that the boss sided with the new worker and apparently, has disregarded all the overtime and commitment put in by B. it's disheartening, i guess, when one puts in many hrs of hard work, only to be granted, and have a new comer (foreign talent, yeah?) towering over her in many ways....
i wish her all the best and told her that the new environment might be better for her. i will surely look her up in the new office, should i drop by there. after all, she has really demonstrated her respy, commitment and hard work in her area of work.
competition from this foreigner....what can i say? i am indeed lucky not to be bothered by all this office politics, so is red.
as she was relating the unfair practice at work since the boss employed a foreign talent (filipino), she shed tears. she's in the 50s and the new worker is in late
20s.
she said,"the filipinos are crafty!"
it's again a case of office power play. but knowing B, she's a responsible worker. she was pissed off upon learning that the new worker is paid more than her but worked shorter hours than her. the latter blatantly showed that she's taking over her job and showed no respect for her 'seniority' and 'experience'.
aye, she mentioned that the boss sided with the new worker and apparently, has disregarded all the overtime and commitment put in by B. it's disheartening, i guess, when one puts in many hrs of hard work, only to be granted, and have a new comer (foreign talent, yeah?) towering over her in many ways....
i wish her all the best and told her that the new environment might be better for her. i will surely look her up in the new office, should i drop by there. after all, she has really demonstrated her respy, commitment and hard work in her area of work.
competition from this foreigner....what can i say? i am indeed lucky not to be bothered by all this office politics, so is red.
sleepless nite or pre-psle stress?
here i am, 2.30 am on tues morn. wee hour. weird hour to be up.
well, i had problem getting to sleep. not sure if it's the pms syndrome or the latent stress acting in my body system.
as i lay on the bed, it was just math questions popping in and out of my mind. yes, the questions that i will be going thru with the stdts over the next few days, before the psle math date on fri.
this is not the 1st time. my mind gets really active before the exams. i will hv numbers jumping up and down. there will be fundamentals nagging me and reminding me,"remember to go thru with the kids about ...."
being able to sleep well is a blessing.
but i reckon, this is the trend that i go thru each semester...so used to it.
of coz, i knw how i would look tmrw....tired and wanting to catch up with a morn nap. luckily, i dont' hv to send the kids to sch anymore. hubby takes care of it all!
counting down the days...hoping that the kids will give their best shot! if only they take more respy to revise and recall effectively, i will be able to sleep better now, haha...
well, i had problem getting to sleep. not sure if it's the pms syndrome or the latent stress acting in my body system.
as i lay on the bed, it was just math questions popping in and out of my mind. yes, the questions that i will be going thru with the stdts over the next few days, before the psle math date on fri.
this is not the 1st time. my mind gets really active before the exams. i will hv numbers jumping up and down. there will be fundamentals nagging me and reminding me,"remember to go thru with the kids about ...."
being able to sleep well is a blessing.
but i reckon, this is the trend that i go thru each semester...so used to it.
of coz, i knw how i would look tmrw....tired and wanting to catch up with a morn nap. luckily, i dont' hv to send the kids to sch anymore. hubby takes care of it all!
counting down the days...hoping that the kids will give their best shot! if only they take more respy to revise and recall effectively, i will be able to sleep better now, haha...
Friday, September 23, 2011
a strange encounter
mom shared with us (red and me) a funny incident that happened in the food court ystday.
in the midst of a meal session, mom noticed an elderly lady staring at their table, particularly looking at trisha. she was puzzled and thought it might be someone that trisha knew.
almost twds the end of the meal, the lady went up to mom and asked,"is this your granddaughter?"
"yes!" mom replied.
"aiyo, i was just thinking, this girl is pretty looking, but her way of eating is really awful..!"
red and i laughed our heads off when mom told us the way trisha chewed on her food. not using the molars but probably working harder on her front teeth and incisors. and not forgetting that trisha has already lost one of her front teeth and the other one is running the risk of drop-off anytime.
red asked trisha,"do u always eat with the front teeth?"
"sometimes," trisha replied, with eyes glued to the TV.
thereafter, trisha was deaf to any questions asked.
red and i were just shocked how quickly she could get 'suck into' the tv realm, haha.
i imitated the way trisha in front of nana. she found it comical and up came her sister, who asked me to demonstrate once more.
well, a pretty face is impt. but the manner that one moves around or eats is even more impt, i reckon. i always say that nana has a very gentle disposition that boys will like. in fact, i think she's growing prettier each day with nice features showing.
maybe 美女多作怪吧！
in the midst of a meal session, mom noticed an elderly lady staring at their table, particularly looking at trisha. she was puzzled and thought it might be someone that trisha knew.
almost twds the end of the meal, the lady went up to mom and asked,"is this your granddaughter?"
"yes!" mom replied.
"aiyo, i was just thinking, this girl is pretty looking, but her way of eating is really awful..!"
red and i laughed our heads off when mom told us the way trisha chewed on her food. not using the molars but probably working harder on her front teeth and incisors. and not forgetting that trisha has already lost one of her front teeth and the other one is running the risk of drop-off anytime.
red asked trisha,"do u always eat with the front teeth?"
"sometimes," trisha replied, with eyes glued to the TV.
thereafter, trisha was deaf to any questions asked.
red and i were just shocked how quickly she could get 'suck into' the tv realm, haha.
i imitated the way trisha in front of nana. she found it comical and up came her sister, who asked me to demonstrate once more.
well, a pretty face is impt. but the manner that one moves around or eats is even more impt, i reckon. i always say that nana has a very gentle disposition that boys will like. in fact, i think she's growing prettier each day with nice features showing.
maybe 美女多作怪吧！
visit to mom's place
i saw my youngest niece, nini at mom's place tonight.
she seemed to hv lost some weight due to recent illness but remained alert with her rolling eyes. she's no longer so fearful of me too. that's great news.
again, i saw the way she ate fruits, apple and rock melon, and actually popo for more!
she was accidentally pushed down by blur trisha who was trying to cross nini's path in a hurried manner. poor nini's butt landed on the floor and shed a little tears. but with so many consolation words from the other older cousins, she quickly recovered. aiya, i told red that nini has enough fats on the butt to cushion the fall lah!
i caught nini hanging her 2 hands and then wrapping around the mommy's shoulder and neck. it was a very cute sight. then, she sat in between red's open legs on the floor...omg, i exclaimed,"look so alike leh. i mean, the legs!"
i took red's camera and snapped few cute pics...turned out red complained that my skill was bad. all turned out so blur. well, i'm never a gadget person, probably couldn't even hold the camera firm in my hand.
the other kids all had great time, asking for few more minutes and eventually, it was up to 10 pm and i chose to walk out of mom's place, so that my claire will not hang around in the room for play anymore.
i'd always enjoyed staying at my mom's place once every fortnight to chat with her. my parents are very open-minded and positive people who can influence the children and grandchildren's behaviour. let's hope the playroom will always be a treasure place for the kids to explore, quarrel and patch up.....growing up with more cousins is always fun!
she seemed to hv lost some weight due to recent illness but remained alert with her rolling eyes. she's no longer so fearful of me too. that's great news.
again, i saw the way she ate fruits, apple and rock melon, and actually popo for more!
she was accidentally pushed down by blur trisha who was trying to cross nini's path in a hurried manner. poor nini's butt landed on the floor and shed a little tears. but with so many consolation words from the other older cousins, she quickly recovered. aiya, i told red that nini has enough fats on the butt to cushion the fall lah!
i caught nini hanging her 2 hands and then wrapping around the mommy's shoulder and neck. it was a very cute sight. then, she sat in between red's open legs on the floor...omg, i exclaimed,"look so alike leh. i mean, the legs!"
i took red's camera and snapped few cute pics...turned out red complained that my skill was bad. all turned out so blur. well, i'm never a gadget person, probably couldn't even hold the camera firm in my hand.
the other kids all had great time, asking for few more minutes and eventually, it was up to 10 pm and i chose to walk out of mom's place, so that my claire will not hang around in the room for play anymore.
i'd always enjoyed staying at my mom's place once every fortnight to chat with her. my parents are very open-minded and positive people who can influence the children and grandchildren's behaviour. let's hope the playroom will always be a treasure place for the kids to explore, quarrel and patch up.....growing up with more cousins is always fun!
Monday, September 19, 2011
to save a life
i watched a movie ' to save a life' at maureen's church.
a teenage show that depicts reality of life. too bad, joy wasnt there but claire was with me.
the gist of the show - jake, a popular basketball player who was loved and idolised by many. he partied and was often gathered by many, at the expense of leaving his childhood friend, johnny behind. johnny is a black negro who grew up with him and had indeed saved jake's life once. he's lame and not good looking, so was shunned my many in school.
one day, johnny fired some shots in the sch campus and eventually killed himself too. jake started to question if johnny could hv been spared his life, had he knew that jake still cared.
then, jake met a youth leader pastor who injected many probing questions into jake's mind. just when everyone deserted jake in one party due to police raid, it was the pastor who picked him up with one of his phone calls. even his girlfriend, amy, drove his truck away.
he started going to church to understand more, formed a group in the campus and even befriended an asian guy who's deemed an uncool nerd.
as the story unfolded, 3 mths after he was distant from amy, she announced herself being pregnant and intended an abortion. at the same time, jake's parents' marriage was crushed and pondering divorce.
jake questioned GOD,"where r u when i need u? i go to church, give my life to u, and this is what i'm getting! it's just not worthy for me to put my trust in u!" nonetheless, he knew that he had no way out for himself, except to continue trusting GOD to show his the way.
the ending was positive, jake stood by amy throughout the whole gestation period, the baby finally delivered was given up for abortion to a childless couple. as for his parents, they decided to unite...jake proceeded with his dream of entering a top university.....
i think, the msg is simple, happiness cannot be bought by money, fame, beauty.....incidentally, ystday, pastor johnaton also shared during the sermon many famous writers, singers, artistes who chose to end their lives through suicides....in the public opinion, they almost had everything!
so, let's ponder about what exactly gives a person happiness? i think it's having real peace at heart and knowing that the pple u care for, also care for you. plus doing sth in life that helps to enrich the lives of others.
truly, giving is often more blessed than receiving.....
a teenage show that depicts reality of life. too bad, joy wasnt there but claire was with me.
the gist of the show - jake, a popular basketball player who was loved and idolised by many. he partied and was often gathered by many, at the expense of leaving his childhood friend, johnny behind. johnny is a black negro who grew up with him and had indeed saved jake's life once. he's lame and not good looking, so was shunned my many in school.
one day, johnny fired some shots in the sch campus and eventually killed himself too. jake started to question if johnny could hv been spared his life, had he knew that jake still cared.
then, jake met a youth leader pastor who injected many probing questions into jake's mind. just when everyone deserted jake in one party due to police raid, it was the pastor who picked him up with one of his phone calls. even his girlfriend, amy, drove his truck away.
he started going to church to understand more, formed a group in the campus and even befriended an asian guy who's deemed an uncool nerd.
as the story unfolded, 3 mths after he was distant from amy, she announced herself being pregnant and intended an abortion. at the same time, jake's parents' marriage was crushed and pondering divorce.
jake questioned GOD,"where r u when i need u? i go to church, give my life to u, and this is what i'm getting! it's just not worthy for me to put my trust in u!" nonetheless, he knew that he had no way out for himself, except to continue trusting GOD to show his the way.
the ending was positive, jake stood by amy throughout the whole gestation period, the baby finally delivered was given up for abortion to a childless couple. as for his parents, they decided to unite...jake proceeded with his dream of entering a top university.....
i think, the msg is simple, happiness cannot be bought by money, fame, beauty.....incidentally, ystday, pastor johnaton also shared during the sermon many famous writers, singers, artistes who chose to end their lives through suicides....in the public opinion, they almost had everything!
so, let's ponder about what exactly gives a person happiness? i think it's having real peace at heart and knowing that the pple u care for, also care for you. plus doing sth in life that helps to enrich the lives of others.
truly, giving is often more blessed than receiving.....
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